Dd overweight - how to deal with it

[MilkRunningOutAgain]

Dd is just 7 and overweight, always has been. She loves food and simply eats too much. Her skinny older brother needs high cal food and eats tons. She wants the same portion sizes, and usually wants seconds. She eats fairly healthily and is the opposite of fussy.

Until now I have not wanted it to be an issue. I restrict treats, for both kids, but otherwise haven't wanted to make it an issue.

It's hard to get her to exercise. Take her to a park and she'll sit on the ground playing imaginary games. She has never run around anywhere near as much as her brother. We go for walks and she does swimming, she likes swimming.

So, someone in her class said she had a fat tummy. She's upset. how should i approach it? Should i talk to her about it? She will notice if she gets smaller portions, I've tried that many times!

Any advice?

[Vibbe]

How often does she swim?

Let her try out new sports that she hasn't done before - maybe riding would be fun? Or karate, football, tennis or dancing?

Offer starters like carrot sticks, celery sticks, radishes and so on, maybe with a dip.
I don't know if she eats quickly, but maybe it would help if she ate slower?

When I was a kid, my parents wouldn't put much on the plates, and if we wanted seconds, then we'd usually have to wait a bit (easier for my parents not to get up several times, but to give seconds to all who wanted at the same time). It also meant that sometimes we'd feel full before getting another portion of food.

I'd also look at breakfast and lunch, to see if there would be anything that could be changed - such as finding alternatives to high sugar cereals and sugary drinks (if that is in the diet), adding more fruit and take out unhealthy snacks if there are any.

[HeySoulSister]

what is she actually eating? and why does her brother need high cal food? what do you give him?

[snoworneahva]

I would gradually reduce her carb portion with veg - fill her plate with at least a couple of different veg, a small amount of starchy carbs and a normal protein portion. As far as possible stay away from pasta/bread - it's so easy to pack away a huge number of calories with these products.

Think activity for body health, rather than weight control because that is mainly what exercise will do for her and the whole family.

Get the sugary treats out of the house and when they want them walk to the shops to get a small one.

[AnythingNotEverything]

I don't think I'd feel comfortable calorie counting or restricting core food groups for a 7 year old.

By all means, instilling healthy habits in both your children is a great idea - ie snacks of carrots and fruit rather than crisps and chocolate, but you'll set her up better for life if you teach her to be comfortable in her skin, rather than try to conform to society's idea of what women should look like.

I would wait until a medical professional suggested she addressed her weight, rather than a peer.

[snoworneahva]

Being comfortable in your skin is great, being an overweight kid is not great for her health. Age 7 you are still more in control of what they eat than you ever will be in the future. I would act now for the sake of her future health...but seek medical advice.

[thaliablogs]

OP - I have the same problem with my nearly 6yo. And she has a skinny younger brother. What's particularly hard for me is that I was the same as a child and have only since my mid 30s got into a healthier weight and exercise relationship - stabilising at a size 12/14 (I am tall so this is not skinny but is at least healthy). So I worry that I don't handle it well, either!

In my dd's case she is actually v active, loves running, swimming, is trying to learn to cartwheel etc., does a physical activity three times a week after school and three diff classes at the weekend (little gym, swimming and tennis), so I can't really up the exercise any more than we do already.

I am trying to teach healthy eating but I think she is getting to feel deprived and so will grab sweet things when she sees them eg at parties, school (where they have a hot pudding on offer every day - argh!).

Doc says she is fine, at top of height/weight charts but not off the chart and given how active she is not to worry. But I do!

Sorry not v helpful but just wanted to say you are not alone.

[lucysmam]

My dd1 is the same as thalia's by the look of her post...active/eats healthily etc but she has a big tum. We are seeing a consultant about various issues she has and I have previously asked about her weight/size as it does worry me (esp. when she needs a swimming cossy or clothes for a 12 rather than 6yo) but his advice was to just let her be. She's a fit, (reasonably) healthy child who enjoys her food.

I think the concern would be more about lack of excercise tbh. Maybe look at trying some different activities with her as suggested in a pp. This is my plan for my dd since the consultant is happy enough that weight and diet are not what is causing my dd's problems

[yournotfat]

I had this happen with one of my sons. I didn't say a word (IMO you are setting them up for a lifetime of body hatred if you make a fuss). I just very gradually reduced the amount of crap food in the house and started to cook food in a more healthy way ie putting lentils and veg in with the mince etc. over the course of a couple of years the weight came off.
Meanwhile I would take every opportunity to build up her self esteem and tell her how beautiful she is. I would suggest you read ( if you already haven't) how Dawn French's father gave her such a positive body image.