Please help....(bit long, sorry)

[justdontknow]

I have always been prone to quite 'down' moods but recently it seems to be happening more and more.

The slightest thing now seems to trigger a 'down' period that is disproportionate, for eg, today found out that 3 friends had been meeting up for brews etc without inviting me. in my rational mind know that this is not a problem and to make it one is very playground mentality but... but sometimes things just knock me for six.

i feel like i'm in a bubble, a step removed from everyone else. my dh and children are brilliant, try to hide my bad feelings from the children. It's just the rest of the world i find hard to deal with.

I can be so unhappy but when I have to go to work, do the school run i just put on my 'coping' face - surely if i was depressed i wouldn't be able to do that??

Am too embarassed to see the doctor, sure he will think of everyone who is really ill and think i should snap out of this - whatever this is.

What's wrong with me?

[OneLieIn]

Hi - sorry to hear you are having a tough time. I am sure the doc will be able to help or if you don't feel like seeing the GP, what about a friend / family / someone in RL that you could talk to?

[justdontknow]

I talk to my dh but would feel so stupid to talk to anyone els about it - there is no reason why i shouldn't be coping but it feels so hard atm.

[OneLieIn]

Why would you feel stupid?

[dragonbaby]

they is no reason why you should feel stupid talkiing to anyone about how you feel you may even feel better just unloading!!!!

[justdontknow]

Because my life is fine - lovely dh and children, work/life balance, supportive family and friends - no earthly reason why i should feel so fragile. My family would be inclined to say snap out of it and think if i told friends i would feel vulnerable. tbh don't think they'd believe me as it's not how i come across but at home i'm up half the night with my mind racing

[OneLieIn]

Please don't feel stupid. You are feeling fragile and sensitive and it must surely be etter to talk about it, than keep it bottled in inside. Just because everything 'is fine' doesn't mean that you are happy. Do you think if you could sort this out, you would be happy? If so, then that should tell yoy all you need to know.

BTW, I also have seemingly perfect life, but have days of dark gloom - my mates all say the same - even the perfect ones!

Is there anyone you could try talking to?

[aly16]

I know just how you feel. My daughter and family are always there for me but when I was down I was always told to snap out of it which obv makes you feel worse! Only tell your closest most trusted friends.
I do think you should see a dr though as I had PND but didn't go to dr for 4 months and once I had seen dr and started antidepressants I felt much better. I now no longer take them after 18 months and feel so much better now. I still have bad days but i get over them.
And about the friend thing, I would have felt like that but now I have a different state of mind and would see it the way it actually is.
Please take my advice and don't feel alone there are soo many people who you can talk to xxxxx

[dragonbaby]

then you need to speak to your docter they wont judge you or just say snap out of it we all hide things and belive me i should know

[justdontknow]

Really? Only have one friend who had pnd, but that is all srted now and she is very happy now. My youngest is 5 tho so not pnd Everyone else seems very together iykwim, and i just feel like there's part of my brai9n missing that would help me deal with any knocks.

Am happy with my life, but not happy inside. it's hard to explain.

If could get over initial talking might help. My dh must be fed up listening

[OneLieIn]

I know it must be hard to talk, but if you could see your GP for starters, he/she may just rule out some things and that in itself may make you less anxious. They can often just give you tips to help for starters. I am sure that you would find a very sympathetic ear for starters.

You might just need some help to be happy inside - why not try the GP?

[justdontknow]

Will try to go - just need to psych myself up i think. dh says it could just be a chemical thing which would explain it i guess.

Thanks for posting, it makes me feel a bit better that other people feel like it sometimes, even whne there is no obvious reason

[OneLieIn]

I think lots of other mums would say the same. Life looks great, but sometimes it just does not feel great.

Please try and go - it could be something that can be easily resolved.

Have a good sleep tonight - (sending you some positive vibes over tinternet!)

[OneLieIn]

How are you justdontknow? Are you OK?