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Mental health

finding motherhood boring and lonely.

10 replies

alright · 08/04/2008 14:28

10wks after birth, no more visitors to see the new baby no more appointments or check ups or things to go out for. fed up of watching telly and eating every day.

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BexieID · 08/04/2008 14:31

Find out if there are any parent and baby groups near you. They are great for meeting other mums.

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VeraSquonk · 08/04/2008 14:32

There are several things you can do, depending on how much you feel like.

First of all, put the baby in the pram and go to the shop to buy a paper. Every day. Say hello to everyone on the way, even if they look at you like you're an eejit.

Ask your health visitor if there are any mum & baby/ mum & toddler groups in your area, and if there are, go along.

Take baby to the library for the weekly kiddie read session.

Take baby to the baby clinic to be weighed every week - not because you need to get him/her weighed, but to get you out, to speak to people.

Have a look at mumsnet local, or the netmums local section to see if there are other mums in your area begging for someone in a similar situation to get together for a cup of tea or whatever.

Join a club/do an evening course in the evenings when your dp gets home.

Tis completely normal to feel down and isolated at this stage, so don't worry about it, or think you are the only one. We've all been there.

Good luck.

xx

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BexieID · 08/04/2008 14:33

Your HV should have a list. I moved to Scotland when Tom was 13 weeks and went to the baby clinic every week until I met other mums on a regular basis.

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alright · 08/04/2008 14:37

i feel scared to meet new people

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VeraSquonk · 08/04/2008 14:39

that's normal and understandable too. If you do some of the things on my list, you won't necessarily have to meet anyone new, but you will be getting out of the house on a regular basis, and be putting yourself out there iykwim.

Perhaps someone wants to be friends with you but is too shy to say hello?

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BexieID · 08/04/2008 14:40

I felt scared too, but having a wee baby with you is a very good ice breaker! Where are you?

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BITCAT · 08/04/2008 14:43

I used to feel exactly the same, trapped in the house, eating and watching crap tv all day and putting on lots of weight not feeling good at all. I agree with everyone else you need to get out and meet other mums, who will all be in need of friends and some company!
I have met a nice group of mums at my childrens nursery and school. We go shopping together when kids dropped off in morning, its not much but it gets me out of the house and keeps me sane, we try to have regular nites out or have girlie nites at each others houses. It just serves to remind us that we are people not just a wife and a mum, and we need some time to ourselves and some adult conversation.

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BexieID · 08/04/2008 14:46

Ask your HV if they do a baby massage class. That was another way of meeting other mums.

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BITCAT · 08/04/2008 14:46

Me too..i was very shy, and scared..but trust me most mums you meet will probably be in the same boat and looking for a friend..most of us very nice!

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BITCAT · 08/04/2008 14:50

rite i'm of to pick the little monkeys up!

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