Have appointment to talk with GP about antenatal depression this afternoon..

[littlelamb]

Help me not chicken out! I have been really low for about a month now, dealing with my sick dd at the same time. I am going to get a sick note for work so that I can get SSP, but while I am there I know I need to bring up how low I am feeling. I posted on the pregnancy board last night about gettign signed off until I can start maternity leave but I spent all of last night awake and worrying about that decision. It wouls involve me being signed off a further two weeks, bringing me up to 29 weeks ( I am in my fourth week of being off, after chicken pox, sickness bugs and me being in hospital with bleeding.) I am worried I will chicken out or try and put a brave face on, but I know that won't help. I have been feeling absolutely hopeless and I do want to get better.

[dustystar]

I have always found it hard to talk about how i am feeling when I am depressed. I find it helps to write a list of what i want to say before I go so that when i am with the GP if I lose the ability to speak (I get too choked up) I can hand them the peice of paper. It also helps me not to forget all the things I want to say as when i am stressed my mind has a tendancy to go blank.

Well done for making the appointment. I hope it goes ok

[IdrisTheDragon]

I have also found when I am going to the doctor when depression is at its worst that writing things down helps.

My other route is to say "things are really not all right at the moment" and burst into tears spectacularly. Both methods seem to work all right.

You will feel better - it may take some time, but you will get there .

[littlelamb]

I had antenatal depression with dd so that should be in my notes, but my situation was very different then. I was a student at uni and could take it relatively easy. This time I have a dd of 3.7 and a full time job to worry about. I don't know wether its better to try and go back for a few weeks or admit that I'm not really coping and take early leave. I think I will write things down, that is a good idea. Last night I was in a proper panic, crying and just generally losing the plot a bit. Dd has woken up feeling much better today so that has brightened up the mood here a bit but I still have a tight feeling of panic in my chest

[jellybellybump]

Hey littlelamb. I was nervous about going to my GP and talking about being depressed. But she was great. All I had to say is I'm not coping very well with being a mum and feeling very low and sad most the time. She completely understood and seemed to say all the right things. Have been on AD's for 3 weeks now and starting to feel better.

Also, once I'd made the appointment, spoken with her and got it off my chest I already felt so much better. So best of luck to you this afternoon.

[littlelamb]

Thank you. Appointment is in 2 hours so am trying to psych myself up for it. I dont know what to do for the best about work. If I dont go back I will feel a failure but at the same time I'm not sure I can cope with going back

[moljam]

i agree with writing list before going.its too eay to chicken out or worry about what doc will think-its very hard to talk about being depressed but remember,you made an appointment thats half of it-they are there to help!goodluck

[anonymous22mner]

just wanted to say good luck and i too have an appointment today. ive just finished writing everything down and it has helped a bit so give it a go.

[dustystar]

I hope today went ok littlelamb

[dustystar]

I hope yours went well too anon

[littlelamb]

Mine went really well thank you. I did get a little choked but no full on tears thankfully. She signed me off for two weeks, so that will take me to my maternity leave. I have been thinking things through rationally and I am not too bothered by works reaction to this. I am not sure I will go back anyway as it is very far away, I don't drive and is very poorly paid for my qualifications and the work it involves. I think that making a firm decision in my head to give up now has lifted a weight. It was on my record that I had had antenatal depression with dd, and she asked what helped that time, and I said quite honestly 'giving birth'. As soon as dd was born the cloud lifted. She has decided to see me again next week, and to see how I manage without antidepressants for the time being. She has also given me the details of several counsellors that I will have to make a donation to see, but I think this is a good option as the nhs waiting list is 6 weeks and counselling really helped last time. I think I might actually sleep tonight It will be harder to cope without my paypacket but I have coped before and I will try to again. I think just being honest with the doctor and myself has really helped. I am going to write to my HR department tomorrow and explain my decision.

[dustystar]

I'm glad it went well How are you feeling today?