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Mental health

not sure how helpful CBT is for me, rather disappointed

26 replies

MissChief · 31/10/2007 12:08

that's it, enough said. It's expensive, it tells me what I could read in a book/hear from a friend (well, okay, probably wouldn't remain one for long!)

I have found it somewhat helpful but only in the sense that a professional has recognised my situation/condition and is giving support but that's it. There's no miracle cure on the horizon and I've been going a couple of months on a weekly basis. I'd thought it would be v practical, v exercise based, v immediate in effect. It's all rather woolly and intangible. It makes me think I AM stuck with this for life as I've tried a range of options now.

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fizzbuzz · 31/10/2007 12:38

Sounds like you have a not very good therapist to me.

It should be practical and exercise based (I think) It was when I did it.

12 sessions should do it (I think), although I think it can be done in 6 x 1/2 sessions

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MissChief · 31/10/2007 18:30

would you mind if i ask what you did exercise wise? Mine certinaly has all the credentials so that's not the problem. Maybe it's my expectatinos. Also, I'm no expert but I have done a lot of reading in this area and have worked around mental health so maybe I've absorbed more than i thought and haven't gained such benefit ifyswim? But i honestly don't know,maybe she's not so good even with all her qualifications. Not had it before so not sure.

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NaeDanger · 31/10/2007 18:39

i went for CBT and quit after a few sessions. I would leave feeling infinitely worse than when i arrived. the woman made me feel stupid and useless. not what i look for in a therapist!

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VoodooLULUmama · 31/10/2007 18:41

i found CBT to be absolutely marvellous

sounds like you have had a bad experience.

the one thing that therapy does not do , is give you the answers or solutions, but the tools to find them yourself.

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jangly · 31/10/2007 18:45

I think CBT is probably over-rated. I mean, its meant to make you change the way you think, isn't it? Well, if you could do that I reckon you wouldn't be having problems in the first place. I really don't think a talking therapy could change my ocd.

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Wisteria · 31/10/2007 18:47

It does depend on what your condition is/ severity of etc, as to how long it takes you but also on the therapist.

There are no 'cures' with CBT; as Lulu says, it's about facilitating change and helping you to help yourself.

Can you discuss what it is you are going for?

If you are in any doubt over your therapist then find out what her credentials are. Unfortunately there are many practicing counsellors out there who have no qualifications and no professional memberships.

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TotalChaos · 31/10/2007 18:52

I found CBT useful in conjunction with meds for OCD. I saw a clinical psychologist privately, who seemed to know the issues inside out, and took a very practical exercised based approach.

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fizzbuzz · 01/11/2007 09:07

I had to make list of what bad thoughts were, identify thinking pattern, and then write a more realistic propsal.

Reading through realistic proposald really helped.

However the reading and writing was the easy bit, the hardest point was challeging negative thoughta as they popped up. I found this exhausting.

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MissChief · 01/11/2007 14:45

thanks, everyone for replying, I'm surprised by the range of responses as previously I'd only heard positive things about CBT. I'm undergoing it on a weekly basis for moderate depression and, I know it's not a miracle cure really, I'[d just expected to feel the benefit by now and I don't think I do. Rahter worrying as I don't know what the alternative is especially as CBT does tend to do well in clincial trials as compared to conventional ADs as treatment for depression. I'd expected so much more but don't feel I've really been given any news "tools" ifyswim? Don't know if any of this makes sense!

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MissChief · 01/11/2007 14:46

oh and fizz, thanks for explaining what you'd been doing during sessions, useful to know what happens to others.

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fizzbuzz · 01/11/2007 20:51

I thought it was meant to be done in CONJUCTION with antidepressants. That was what my therapist told me.

You may not think it's working, but when you feel shitty in the future you should be able to think slightly differently. It won't be dramatic and you still have to work at it, but it is meant to be a tool to be used in the future as well

It's still hard work though

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NaeDanger · 02/11/2007 06:49

I was given various exercises to do. one was to right down some of my negative thoughts.
so i'd write that such and such had happened and i felt stupid and useless.
the therapist would look at me and say 'but you're not stupid are you? so why would you think that?'
cue me feeling really stupid and useless.

such fun.

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ScummyMummy · 02/11/2007 07:13

Can you tackle this directly with the therapist?

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Wisteria · 02/11/2007 09:39

For mild depression, CBT without any meds can be just as productive.

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fizzbuzz · 02/11/2007 21:22

Well from what I understand, that should have been met with what type of thought is this eg a blanket statement, because no one is stupid or useless all the time.

Her response should have been something like: It is not possible to be stupid and useless all the time, think about situations where you have been clever/forward thinking/whatever. Everyone is stupid /useless a little bit, but not all the time. This would be a "realistic" answer to your thoughts.
Also, think about what you are good at would help, AND when this type of thought pops up in your head (these are called "hot" thoughts, ie the ones you can't control) challenge it with something like "I don't have to think like this, I am as able and competent as anyone else"

I found this bookwww.amazon.co.uk/Feeling-Handbook-Plume-David-Burns/dp/0452281326/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/202-9675281-291505?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21 4?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1194038444&sr=8-1, incredibly helpful, as helpful as therapist, and I normally hate self help books! This one is recommended by MIND

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NaeDanger · 03/11/2007 09:53

fizzbuzz - thank you so much for that link. they have a copy at our local library so I'm going to check it out.

I wish the therapist would read it too.

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MissChief · 06/11/2007 13:02

I can't right now think what new tools I've been given. My therapist is accredited and a qualified pyschologist so no worries on that score, I just don't know if it's that she's not making an effort with me, as she should
or that my expectations were too hgih in the first place.
Hmm. quite worrying as all the research seems to be pointing to the efficacy of CBT as compared to ADs, makes me worry what the hell can work for long-term depression. If that makes sense.

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MissChief · 10/11/2007 20:25

bump.
I've been going privately too, very expensive to do so and I honestly don't feel I'm getting the benefit from the £100s spent. Not sure what to do next.

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pinkteddy · 10/11/2007 20:37

It may not be the CBT but the therapist? My sister had years of psychotherapy for anxiety and depression which helped marginally but she said she felt a marked improvement after 10 sessions of CBT. You could try ringing the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy for advice?

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MissChief · 10/11/2007 20:47

thanks for yr message. I'm losing faith in it to be honest. I found my therapist via the BACP website, she's accredited and highly qualified, it just doesn't seem to be doing anyhting for me.

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pinkteddy · 10/11/2007 21:00

Well maybe it isn't for you. But it may be worth another go with someone else. Sometimes you just don't 'click' with someone I guess. I read this article in the Guardian recently. article May be of interest? It recommends a book too.

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MissChief · 11/11/2007 10:53

that's an interesting article and a cheaper way to go than CBT...i'm only half-joking, I think if you're paying it really has to be worth it, otherwise the £ could be better spent on extra childcare, w/e away, CBT books etc. I've spent £100s so far and don't see the results. It pisses me off, tbh, feel I've been duped. And I don't know where to turn now. Sorry, for my feisty tone, been rather a morning.

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puppydavies · 11/11/2007 11:23

i had some intermittent cbt on the nhs and didn't find it very helpful tbh. that may have been for many reasons - irregular sessions, didn't gel w/therapist, whatever.

i think my main problem was that i didn't buy into the whole basis of the therapy and my therapist didn't manage to convince me why i should. basically his approach was that negative thinking caused the depression and i saw it the other way round. i'm totally capable of positive/realistic thinking when i am well but when i'm depressed i'm not. so while tackling the negative thought patterns can relieve the symptoms a little it does not tackle it at its root for me.

now this may just be me getting the wrong end of the stick, but you'd think a competent therapist would be able to explain it in a way that made sense to me and mine just couldn't.

i have had repeated episodes of depression over many years and i have very much learned to live with it as part of who i am. i've made significant lifestyle changes to minimise some of the triggers, i've developed coping strategies to deal with the worst bits. (well, i say i, i mean we, i have a very supportive partner). i've learned to recognise the signs of it coming on and get onto the meds that i know relieve my worst symptoms immediately. i'm learning to meditate as i think that might be a helpful avenue for me.

but most of all i've given up trying to find a cure or a cause and letting go of that hope that i may ever be fixed has been quite liberating for me. i just live my life in the in-between-bits and try to take each day as it comes.

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MissChief · 11/11/2007 11:40

thanks, pd - I found yr message re reassuring and helpful. Glad you've more or less worked it out for you, I sympathise with much of what you say - doubting the fact that -ve thinking causes depression rather than it being something hard to fix permanently. I feel mine is glossing over the edges, bigging me up, telling me how much I have to cope with and how once my children are older/job is better etc etc I will be okay and til then I just need support and childcare etc to help me thro to that time. I feel I'm not really being listened to, it's more than that, IFYKWIM, a permanent tendency, a permanent vulnerabtiliy I have. Simply talking about sleep hygiene or my childcare arrangements does not fix anything and I need and sought so much more. I'm deeply disappointed and rather anxious for future bouts as CBT had always felt like the holy grail of cures and is touted as such ofen. Great for those whom it helps, how many of use does it fail though? And what then?

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puppydavies · 11/11/2007 12:01

i totally understand your anxiety. i think the way forward can be to work on putting as many safety nets in your path as possible, in the full knowledge that it will happen again, the only surprise being when. and cbt models of thinking can be one of those safety nets, perhaps to keep you away from the brink, but naff all use once you've actually teetered over.

i do believe in retraining pathways, i figure that if we practice mental coping strategies often enough they become ingrained and accessible even at our lowest moments. and i guess this is probably the core of cbt, but i find it too simplistic, too rational, too thinking. in the same way i've seen my body respond to a degree i wouldn't have thought possible to disciplined yoga practice i hope if i can meditate on a regular basis that will might give me one last safety net in the very depths of depression that could keep me from doing something stupid. meditation taps in to a different level than the rational and hopefully is accessible when everything else has gone to pot.

will stop now as am sounding like hippy loon

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