Pregnancy Support

[calebsmum]

Am about 9wks pregnant with DC2 and although I have good days I also suffer with depression and panic attacks.

Thought it would be nice if we could have a thread where us pregnant peeps who have mental health problems could support each other.

I'm currently on 10mg of seroxat and feeling low and worrying how i'm going to cope with 2 DC.

[MiloMummy]

I'm 27.5 wks and started anti-depressants this week (50mg Sertraline). I was beginning to get treatment for my depression when I found out I was PG but I have struggled with the idea of taking medication while pregnant (didn't even take a paracetamol all through PG 1)

Feel very guilty as I haven't enjoyed this pregnancy at all and feel like i'm already treating my 2 kids differently when no 2 isn't even born yet. Infact several times I have doubted whether I want this child at all but I'm starting to feel better about it now (although I too am dreading all the extra work and juggling that comes with 2)

This thread is a great idea. It's so hard when everyone is gushing over you and giving congratularions when the last thins on earth you feel like doing is celebrating.

[coby]

What a fantastic idea to start this thread!

I am 11 weeks pregnant with No3 and came off citalopram to conceive this one. They let me off the meds because I have been cured of my long term depression while pregnant with DD1 and DD2 but (sods law) no cure this time. It's a bit easier at the moment but I have been very very down with this pregnancy at times.

MilosMummy- 2 is not as much hard work as you might think (honestly), you get used to it pretty quickly. My poor DD2 doesn't get half the attention DD1 did at her age, I think it is just the way it goes but I often feel guilty about it. I've asked other mums and I think it is just the lot of the second child

[calebsmum]

Well then there's 3 of us to give each other support! Saw my counsellor today and she's referred me to the mother and baby unit in the psychiatric unit again (saw them with 1st pregnancy). Am not feeling too bad today, am really trying hard to fight this horrid depression, am feeling so numb and zombie like.

Coby am hoping I get used to having 2 DC quite quickly, i'm around 9/10wks pregnant and hoping the sickness will pass soon. My mum had 3 children and the last 2 were very close together and she said she just didn't have the time to give us all attention so we were left to it alot, but we still had a good childhood and I have good memories so can't have been all bad!

Milomummy, everyone keeps saying to me "you must be so excited" and I grin and nod when inside i'm screaming "i'm scared!, hug me!". Am not thinking alot about the pregnancy to be honest, just trying to get on with day to day life, just wish I wasn't on medication, worry about effect on the baby although DS turned out ok.

[smithfield]

Hi

Would like to join this thread. I was on ad's after Ds1. Came off them to concieve DC no 2.

Have felt pretty miserable right the way through so far, am now six months. At first I thought it was because I felt so sick for three months.

I too feel terrible guilt as at 39 Im sooo blessed to be able to concieve (not saying thats old btw, just that I always feared maybe I couldn't)

Have to say depression has plagued me most my life...wish it would just bog off frankly

[MiloMummy]

So good to read these replies and realise I'm not the only one! Have felt much better since I started ADs last week - I know it's not the meds as they won't have kicked in properly yet. I think it's just that physchologically I feel good about my decision and feel positive to be taking control.

Coby - thanks for the reassurance! I know I will cope because I'll have to!!! Think the anticipation is often worse than the reality (in lots of areas!)

calebsmum - I know what you mean about worrying about taking ADs while PG - I struggled for 6 months with the idea but finally realised it'll be better for my baby (and DS1) to have a stable Mum than a jibbering wreck with no interest in them. How long have you been taking ADs? I asked for Sertraline especially as I read it's one of the better ones for pregnancy and breastfeeding which I'm keen on doing again.

smithfield - When are you due? I'm Jan 22nd. Looks like the other 2 are pretty close in dates and so are we! You mentioned feeling guilty because you feel you should be grateful and not depressed. That's exactly how I feel much of the time. I use the word guilty a lot.

[smithfield]

Milomummy- I am due 15th Feb. I was on sertraline after having my Ds, it was recommended cos I was breast feeding. I did really well on it. Would definately go back on it after this bub comes.

I dont know what to do cos I was determined to stay off Ads for pregnancy...plus Ive had a few issues with this pregancy which has meant Ive taken antibiotics and oral steroids. Also I currently have to take two inhalers twice a day!...So I just feel like NO I cant put anymore drugs in there IYKWIM?

Be interested to know how depression affects you guys as in what symptoms do you get with it?

[coby]

hello again all

Smithfield, I've was first diagnosed with depression 13 years ago but I suspect I have had it for longer than that. It affects me in different ways at different times. At the moment I am not too bad [woohoo emoticon] - and when I am a bit better I cannot remember how things were or how I felt when I was bad. I suppose one of the worst symptoms I can think of right now is the total inability to motivate myself to do anything -even make a drink for myself if I am really thirsty. Nothing gets done, the children are relatively ignored and that, of course, makes me feel worse. Also large chunks of my life seem to be very hazy as a result of the illness.

I have had two courses of CBT - the first was to treat panic / anxiety and I now have that well under control as a result , I will always get attacks but I know how to cope with them so they don't escalate.

The second course is ongoing and is directed at the depression which has never dropped below a 'moderate' classification in 13 years

I only recently started ADs really and plan to go back on them as soon as DC3 is born if I need them.

It's not all bad though, my life is very different to how it might have been if I didn't suffer from all this but I have been able to offer support and advice to others going through the same thing and that means a fair bit to me - goodness knows its all pretty scary when it first hits you!

[smithfield]

Hi Everyone,

Hi Coby just wrote a big long post and lost it [angry} so I will just say I totally relate to your post.

Sorry guys having a bad day and feels like dep getting worse!

How are you all doing/coping today?

[coby]

smithfield - lol, thought it was only me that managed to do that

I've been ill all day and blaming it on morning sickness only to have DD2 be repeatedly sick all over me this evening so I guess it's not ms after all. DD1 and DH reporting feeling unwell too so I'm not looking forward to the next few days

I suppose on the bright side, bugs don't last as long as ms, but I hate to see the little ones ill and upset and it is just adding to a slight downhill turn I've been taking over the past few days grrrrr

[smithfield]

coby - last night I made ds go to bed without tea, milk, t.v, cos he wouldnt eat his tea (he normally is bad this time of day for eating anyway)
We'd had 2 trips to the naughty step before that.

After half an hour I got him up again and he promised to eat some tea...which he did.

This morning I found he was sick evrywhere last night.

So A) looks like we're in the same boat and b) Im now feeling v guilty

I felt worse when I had Ms...you will probably perk up a bit after you get past the three month and ms bit. I know I did.
Unfortunately Ive recently gone down hill again...but I think thats due to lots of other stuff going on. So hang in there all this might pass....

PS where is everybody!!!

[coby]

smithfield - ooopps! Don't feel too guilty - 'tis the fuel of depression . I'm sitting here in some old clothes and surrounded by terry squares just in case . Didn't get much sleep last night as the slightest sound made me think little one was ill again.

Lets hope we haven't heard from the others because they have been miraculously cured.

Yes, pretty sure MS makes the depresson a lot worse. I'm 12 weeks tomorrow and kidding myself it is going to get better soon but DD2 ms lasted until 30 weeks. This one is different though so fingers crossed.

[smithfield]

Coby How are you doing...anymore sickness from the Lo's. Hows the ms?
Thankfully DS not been sick again and has managed to keep down some food...albeit bits snd bobs of food. He seems to have perked up late afternoon. Have to say I am all c'beebied out. Looking forward to some adult t.v tonight!

Milomummy how are you doing...be interested as to how you are, esp as Im beginning top feel maybe I should consider AD's after all. worried if this is how I feel now what will it be like by time baby arrives.

Anyhow hope you are all feeling well and that wretched monster dep not taking hold.

[coby]

smithfield - DH has got it now, hoping DD2 is better but I'll give it a day before I'll say she is I think! We spent all day yesterday watching the muppets - thankfully we have every episode on DVD but maybe I could do with muppet break for now so hoping DD1 escapes the bug! Have you taken ADs before? - I know you aren't on them now.

I have been told by my midwife that if you are depressed during pregnancy it is best to get some form of treatment (be it CBT, ADs, Coucilling) before the baby is born as that apparently reduces the risk of PND by about 50%! No idea how that stands for those who are long term sufferers but might be worth having a word with your MW?

[smithfield]

Hi Coby- fingers crossed DD1 escapes-you may have to keep hubby in quarantine I think .

I was on sertraline for about a year and a half..came off when I wanted to conceive. Maybe I should ask about CBT-not sure how available it is though.

Ds still seems ok, got some colour in his cheeks today and at least we got out of the house...which I needed after y'day...

Hope your having a good day.

[MiloMummy]

Hi everyone. Got to say I'm still feeling stacks better since starting my ADs - still think it's the phychological effect as it's only been 2 and half weeks but hell, who cares! Just enjoying feeling better.

Bit worried about December though as DH has a very heavy workload (he's in Panto about 50 miles away) and I'll be heavily PG with DS (2.6) to contend with plus Christmas to prepare. Trying not to go there yet tho!

[smithfield]

milomummy- glad your feeling better! Hope you still are doing well

Coby- how are you?

In fact how is everyone doing? Come on girls lets keep the support line going...or are we all too depressed and suffering ms to be *** lol

Im feeling a lot better. Not even sure why really. But I do feel less tired so dont know if thats the link. Think I have just felt very overwhelmed lately with work,lo, and hubby flat out with new business.

Guess thats how I deal with stress...just shut dowm. Anyway seem to have snapped out of it for the time being so will see how I go!

Nut as Im feeling better Im here with my support hat on so come on guys!

[smithfield]

milomummy- glad your feeling better! Hope you still are doing well

Coby- how are you?

In fact how is everyone doing? Come on girls lets keep the support line going...or are we all too depressed and suffering ms to be *** lol

Im feeling a lot better. Not even sure why really. But I do feel less tired so dont know if thats the link. Think I have just felt very overwhelmed lately with work,lo, and hubby flat out with new business.

Guess thats how I deal with stress...just shut down. Anyway seem to have snapped out of it for the time being so will see how I go!

Now as 'Im' feeling better, Im here with my support hat on so come on guys!

[smithfield]

oops not sure how I managed to double post...was trying to edit first post!

[orangehead]

What a great thread. I got pnd after ds1, 7 months later I finally admitted to myself I was depressed and went to get ad, which was a big step, but then found out I was pregant the next day so I never took them. I was devasted, I couldnt cope with one child never mind two. The depression just got worse and worse infact I think I flipped, acting very out of character. I didnt want the baby and just wanted to kill myself. My gp really wanted me to go on ad but I refused so I ended up being under a shrink. I really thought I could just hand the baby over when I gave birth and say I dont want it because I felt nothing towards him. But when I gave birth, everything changed not only did I want my little boy but I somehow felt normal again. I really feel that with the pnd and then the extra dose of hormones with pregancy just tipped me over the edge. Because once I had him I wasnt depressed. My life then took a downward spiral, my husband then left 3 weeks later taking all our savings, and my newborn was not like my ds1 who was an easy baby, he just screamed all the time. But despite this I somehow coped, infact in a way I think it helped as I knew I could so easily go down again I knew I had to fight against it, I suppose like adrenaline kicking in. Anyway several years on I have two lovely boys and I wouldnt change anything. I still get bad patches but I spot my symptoms early and get on ad, but I have never been as bad as what I was like when I was pregant.
Im telling you this so hopefully you can see there is light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to take one day at a time.
Hope you all ok. When I went through it I left like I was the only one and felt like a awful mother for the way I was feeling. I hope it helps you all to know you are not alone

[coby]

Hello all,

Glad to hear some of you are feeling better .

Milomummy, it might not be just a psychological effect of taking the ADs. I was very suprised to find how quickly my Citalopram worked, it continued to work for me until I came of it to make this little monster I am growing right now.

Smithfield, sorry I've not been on here recently , been busy doing battle with various bugs

Orangehead, many thanks for taking the time to post and offer your support.

Calebsmum - WHERE ARE YOU?????

[calebsmum]

Sorry, started the thread then vanished! Have now just entered the 2nd trimester and the crippling tiredness is easing off so I have some spare time hence MN!

I've suffered from panic attacks since I was a little girl although I wasn't diagnosed till I was 18 when I developed agoraphobia. Think i've always had problems with depression as well. I tend to have periods ranging from a few months to a year where I feel fine and think i'm 'cured' then i'll have a bit of a breakdown and be really depressed with horrendous panic attacks. Have had CBT and counselling and found counselling very effective.

Have good days and bad days, depression is horrendous but it's the panic attacks that make me feel like I want to die, I just can't cope with feeling so scared and getting no relief.

How's everyone else doing?? I'm not too bad at the moment, still scared to death about coping with 2 children though!

[JackBlackRoady]

hello all, i have just read all your posts and they made me feel better, i am 15 weeks pg with my second and feeling so sick, tired and worried i sometimes don't know what to do with myself. then i do something nice like go for a little walk or talk to DS after school or ring DH at work or read MN and i feel better, so i think i am making myself feel worse, if that makes sense. Hope you are all having a good day,
JBR
xxx

[smithfield]

Hi there,

Sorry Ive not posted for ages, but have been dealing with some emotional stuff. trying to get to the root of my depression really. Seems to be working as I do feel better.

Unfortunately Ive developed aneamia and asthma with this pg so, its been hard going, but also with the aneamia Im so lethargic and so I end up thinking its the depression IYSWIM.

Coby- are you all better now- or more bugs to battle?

Calebsmum-poor you with the panic attacks ((((hugs)))) I find the depression hard enough without having to deal with that on top, I cant imagine.
Glad to hear the therapy helps-Ive just
started.

jackblackroady-welcome-yes the little positive things like walks etc are key aren't they. I know for me if I have been indoors all day i feel worse. Its just getting that motivation up to do that thing that we know will make a difference to our mood.
Also seems so much harder when pregnant cos Im not sure where my pregnancy symptoms and depression symptoms begin and end IYKWIM?

[calebsmum]

Just thought I'd boost this thread and see how everyone is doing?? I've been fine now i've got to 6months i've been having some problems with anxiety but am trying to keep it all under control, am finding the evenings hard though.

[BigBadMouse]

I've namechanged since my last post - I used to be coby.

Things gone rather downhill for me - saw psych today which helped though. Just going to try and sit it out for now and do some damage limitation as best I can.