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Mental health

DH started on AD's today

5 replies

somegirlsarebiggerthanothers · 02/10/2007 13:07

Have changed my name to protect DH as he is a very private person and would not like to know I am posting on a public forum about him! DH started on citalopram today - he has a long history of anxiety and depression, had an ulcer in his 20's, has had suicidal episodes etc. Lately he has been feeling very down and says he feels like he is having a mid life crisis, not in a jokey sense but in a "what is it all about?" sense. He is not happy in his job but his depression stops him doing anything constructive about it, he just does not seem to have the energy. He is always comparing himself to his friends and saying he is a failure. Well we are not rich but to me that is not important anyway, we have a good life and two lovely girls, it's just a shame that these black moods he gets into overshadow everything positive. I feel relieved in a way that he has finally decided to try the AD's - he has done self help including counselling, nutrition, SJW, exercise etc and they all help a bit but nothing seems to really tackle this underlying deep sense of inadequacy that he has. At the same time I feel a bit anxious about what to expect in terms of side effects etc. He has been suicidal at times so I hope the AD's don't affect him in that way - I also hope they work, as it feels like a sort of last resort. It can be quite hard at times living with someone with depression - to a certain extent it rubs off, although I try not to let it. I have read some of the threads on here about citalopram and it seems to have mixed reviews. Sorry for the long ramble but this is something I can't really talk about to anyone else, just wanted to express some of my mixed feelings about all this. Fingers crossed for DH, I would love to see him happy again.

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milliways · 02/10/2007 17:21

Bumping for you

My DH took AD's from Easter 2006 and has recently stopped now. I takes huge courage to realise and accept you need help - like for any illness.

I second how hard it is to live with someone who suffers from depression, you never know what to do or say for the best. Hopefully he will now see some gradual improvement - my DH did (although he did get awful headaches to start with & had the dose adjusted).

A good relationship with his GP will also help tremendously - ours was fabulously supportive.

Good luck

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lizandlulu · 02/10/2007 21:45

my dh has been on ad's for 9 months, and has no side effects at all, apart from sometimes he can feel a little sleepy. they really do seem to have helped him deal with things. he has just got a puppy dog, and that seems to have helped him, more than any tablets,but everyone is different. i know how hard it is and just wanted to let you know, you are not alone.

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somegirlsarebiggerthanothers · 03/10/2007 13:50

Thanks for your messages. We do have a good GP - in fact she is a very good of ours and very understanding. Good to hear other people have been in the same boat and seen some benefit.

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lucyellensmum · 03/10/2007 14:58

somegirls, your husband has taken a really positive step towards a brighter future. He is very lucky to have you to stand by him, as a sufferer of anxiety and depression i cannot say how much the support of your partner means, even if we dont show it. I know it is so hard for my DP as the poor sod never knows what he is coming home to, so you have my utmost respect.

I am on citalopram, i have found it has worked really well for me, its not a miracle cure (although my DP thinks it is!) and i have bad days but it has help immeasurably. It is supposed to take 2 weeks to a month to start working properly so dont expect overnight changes (saying that, i noticed a change day 2!!). There could be some side effects in the first few weeks especially, the most common being feeling sick, rushy and insomnia. I felt a bit sick, but nothing more than that. Apparently some people experience a worsening of negative thoughts and anxiety in the first few weeks and it is really good that your DP has you around to watch for any negative changes, this was the thing that scared me, losing control, so i pre warned DP and he said he would watch me. But i was fine.

I can really identify with your DPs feelings, it is a demanding world in which we live and if you are not earning mega bucks and you dont have the right car, address etc you are made to feel second rate. We should not let ourselves be dictated to in this way, but its easier said than done.

This is a great forum for hearing about peoples experiences and so far my citalopram experience has been positive, i hope the same goes for your DH and he feels the benefit soon.

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somegirlsarebiggerthanothers · 04/10/2007 14:08

Hi lucyellensmum - thanks for that and good for you for taking steps to deal with your own depression. Your message is much appreciated.

So far so good, day 3 today and no side effects so far. Fingers crossed!

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