What kind of counselling for getting over difficult birth a year on!!

[Sixofone]

I'm not sure if this is the right place to post so apologies if not but I hope someone will advise anyway!

To cut a long story short, I had a normal pregnancy until around 28 weeks when my blood pressure shot up. Had a horrible time after that in and out of hospital and ended up with an early induction (and normal birth) followed by another week in hospital before they'd let me go home.

DD is a year old now and I still haven't got over it - I can feel my heart pound and my BP shoot up every time I go to the doctors even if it isn't an appointment for me, and am too scared to think about trying for no. 2. I think part of it is that I'm a bit of a control freak, and being out of control and having mine and dd's life in someone else's hands was terrifying. I also work in a hospital and usually make these sorts of decisions about other people so to be on the receiving end (even when I knew people meant well) was very distressing.

Anyway...I think I need some counselling as I can't move on. Has anyone had any and if so what kind, as I know there are different sorts and I don't know which to go for (I am going to pay for it myself rather than let the GP know about it). Thanks x

[Twinklemegan]

Oh Sixofone, I'm so sorry to hear this. My DS is 11 months and I'm in a similar place to you.

It all came to head recently when I was called for a smear. That was horrendous for reasons I won't go into, but the relevant thing is that all the birth memories were flooding back and I ended up breaking down at both appointments. The doctor has referred me for counselling at the hospital which is starting with a consultant's appointment to go through my birth notes. They doctor has requested a specific appointment with me before and after the consultant's appointment and the consultant has set aside an extra long appt at the end of the day.

So maybe it is worth discussing it with your GP (or another sympathetic GP) to begin with. Mine's been very understanding so far.

[lulumama]

bith trauma association too, can be done by email.

if you do a search on here, for birth trauma, and 'lulumama' , you will hopefully find some reassuring words, and threads x

[Sixofone]

Thanks for all your replies and for the helpful links - going to start with the Birth Trauma Association (Twinkle, I'm avoiding a smear too!) I think and take it from there. I can't be doing with this as when I already have high BP, stressing pushes it up even higher! Aargh