Feel so confused

[Lizziebethus]

I have a lovely 9 month old baby and a wonderful partner but am very isolated where I live (moved here just after he was born). I have been feeling steadily worse over the last few months. I'm so weepy all the time, I can't stop obsessing over things (my mind kind of gets stuck in 'loops'), I am really irritable with my son and partner. I feel so tired all the time and can't manage to get dressed/go out/do housework etc. I can't work out if I'm depressed or just feeling lonely - the prospect of having to go and meet people seems too much to cope with too though :-( Before I got pregnant I had been Bulimic for 10 years but since getting pregnant I have been symptom free, however, my confidence is at an all time low as I am now 2 stone heavier than before I got pregnant. I feel SO guilty for 'wallowing' around when I should be enjoying life with my baby and husband. I know I should go to the doctors or see the HV but I feel like a bit of a fraud because I do have good days and I really don't want councilling as I had it for my eating disorder in the past and found it horrid (really upsetting and made things worse). I'm not sure what I'm even expecting from posting this really but any words of wisdom greatly appreciated...

[lori21]

we moved just after my lo was born. it is so hard getting into a new area when you have a lo as well. have you joined any mother and baby groups or even just a walk to the local park. i joined a choir - gets my mind working, gets me out of the house and gets me meeting people. often local colleges run weekend or eveving courses so there maybe something of interest. the hardest thing can be to do something new but you may find that is all you need. if not don't feel guilty about talking to your dr and hv. that is what they are there for

[RantInEminor]

Hi. First of all please don't feel guilty or inadequate for feeling the way you do. I felt just like this when my ds was a small baby. Many people do. It's hard having a new baby, it causes so many changes in your life and in your relationship with your partner. It is extremely tiring too.

I think moving to a new area is one of the hardest things to cope with unless you are an extremely confident and outgoing person. I moved to a new town when ds was 2 and it really set me back. I am quiet by nature and it took me a long time to build new friendships and many painful weeks of going to toddler groups alone before really making any friends. However, it was all worth it eventually and two years on I feel very settled where I am. Finding a part time job helped me the most in making connections in the area although you may not be ready for that yet.

My advice is to take one day at a time, try and make yourself get up, get dressed and go out each day even if it's just for a walk to the park or the shops. Log on here for support there's always plenty of it about. But most of all, please, if things get too much of a struggle go and see your HV or your GP. I know you've had a bad experience in the past but there are good therapists out there who can help you. I suffer on an off with depression and after my ds was born although I had good days there were too many bad days too ignore. I went to my GP and was prescribed AD's which I took for a year and also had a weekly counselling session with a very good therapist. It really helped.