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Mental health

I walked out on my kids today...

21 replies

FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 09:54

I feel awful, and don't know what to do!
I just can seem to become more patient/less angry! I have started to take AD's and I thought I seen some improvement. But I was in holidays... Today as I am back into the full swing of work, my house, nursery run, etc. I lost it very fast!
I am on the waiting list for therapy.
What else can I do?

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vnmum · 08/01/2007 10:00

how long have you been on ADs and which ones are you on?

i have been depressed recently and i had little or no patience with my DS and was very angry too.

could your GP sign you off work for a time to ease the pressure and stress on you?

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DimpledThighs · 08/01/2007 10:01

Do you have any techniques to calm yourself? I have a good anixety management sheet with breathing exercises that may help.

Also if a situation is escalating is there a way you can detect this and remove yourself just to another room for a few moments to regain calm?

In my family once I get wound up everyone gets wound up and it gets in a spiral. I have learnt to take a few seconds to calm myself before it gets out of hand.

I am glad you are getting help through AD's - they take a while to kick in.

Best wishes.

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kittypants · 08/01/2007 10:02

antidepressants take a while to kick in .

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FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 10:42

I am very good at removing myself. This is what I did today, and thus walk out on my kids...
It works in terms of not escalating a situation, but I think is making my kids incredibly anxious.
Today, it was something really simple. I put the kids in the car and sat myself to drive everybody. My DH starts telling me what to do (which he knows I hate!), I snap at him. He does it again, I snap again. He tell I should keep my cool. I said I will if he can just shut up. He gets the message and shuts up for 5 min. Then he make yet anothe "suggestion" on the same topic. I loose it, stopped the car and told him to drive. He refused. I said we should all take the bus. He said I should. So I did.
All this in fornt of the kids
I feel in relation to me and DH I did the right thing. But it wasn't right for the kids...

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FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 10:43

I am taking Ads only for a month. But I thought it was already working.
Would it relly change myself so much that things that bother me would stop bothering me?

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FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 12:02

.

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ParanoidAndroid · 08/01/2007 12:04

ADs can sometimes take 6-8 weeks to kick in.

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FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 12:07

How do we know it is working?
how diferent should i feel?

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Jazzi · 08/01/2007 12:07

AD's take a while to settle, at least 3 months, the doctor told me that I would still get the odd time of anxiety or depression whilst taking ad's but the symptoms and length of time should decrease.

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FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 12:12

Did it work for anyone in terms of reducing anger? or is this part of reducing anxiety?

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Jazzi · 08/01/2007 12:37

It helped to reduce my anger, I got very stressed with my 2ds's and dp. It hasn't diminished completely, but it has certainly reduced. What ad's are you on, if they are not working go back and see your doctor. It can take time to find the correct prescription, don't give up, it will get better, but you have to go back to discuss further with your doctor.

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FullOfTestosterone · 08/01/2007 12:40

thanks jazzi! I am on sertraline, a very low dose. I am only taking half of the recommended prescription. Since I've felt better, I though it was enough. Maybe I should increase?

The thing is. Today, I wasn't screaming or anything. I walked away calmly and controlled. But I just wish everything didn't bothered me so much!
I wonder if any drug in the world will solve this problem...

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Jazzi · 08/01/2007 12:45

I would take the prescribed amount and give it another month, if things are no better go back to the docs. My doctor explained that ad's should make you feel 'normal' which means you will have good and bad days, but the bad should not outnumber the good. Hope that helps xx

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flimflam · 08/01/2007 15:13

Hi FoT

You say you walked away quietly and calmly. This seems like a positive thing to me. Kids are experts at winding adults up and to be in control enough to step back sounds like a good thing to me.

If they are showing anxiety it is probably through your reaction to your DH.

ADs can take a while to settle - esp as you haven't been taking your prescribed dose. I'd see your GP again and mention any fears to him.

Good luck x

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rainbowgirl · 08/01/2007 21:43

i'd say, take the dose that you've been prescribed! antidepressants do work, specially if you are lucky enough to hit on the right one. it certainly won't do you any harm to try, and from your posts it sounds like you need it. i'm 29 weeks pregnant and suffering from depression (again) and having a nightmare about which antidepressant, if any, i can take and it be ok for the baby. i've got a separate thread on this in fact. i keep longing to be able to just think of me in this equation and not in relation to the pregnancy. so look at it this way - you need to get yourself better to be the best you can for all of you, your kids, dh and yourself. i'm getting the anger thing too. it is part of the stress/depression equation. i'm on such a short fuse. so i can relate to how you feel. good luck xx

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Paddlechick666 · 08/01/2007 21:48

hey RG, sorry for hijack thread, just wanted to say hi and that i think about you quite often.

sorry to hear about the depression, take care of yourself and your dcs.
;-)

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essbee · 08/01/2007 22:03

Message withdrawn

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noraa · 08/01/2007 22:19

you thinking about how you will take AD's.
why only you should be trying in that way? is this only yr fault? any person could react the same way maybe?
i think first you should solve the problem in the relation with dh/dp then if necessary take AD's.
good luck...

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rainbowgirl · 10/01/2007 18:13

paddlechick you too!! i've been totally out of the loop and really depressed. i will email when i get a chance. currently moving house. much love xx

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Blu · 10/01/2007 18:31

FoT: If you are on a prescribed low dose, then take the full dose you have been given!

I was on low dose ADs (Cipralex 10mg) and the main symptom of my depression had been anger exactly as you describe...and a few similiar debacles. And yes, the ADs worked very quickly and took away that unstoppable feeling of fury and frustration.

In all honesty, my advice would be to start on the proper dose immediately, give it tow weeks and if you still don't feel better, go back to your GP.

Good luck.

You know when you are not feeling 'right' - it's such a relief to feel more like yourself again. That's what ADs did for me - I felt so much more like me instead of a fury-fuelled mad woman! I took ADs for 6 months and then felt I was ok to stop, which I did easily.

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essbee · 10/01/2007 21:47

Message withdrawn

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