I've been married for 18 years. We have had some tough times but the last couple of years it's probably been worse. OH has said a few times over the years that he is depressed but wouldn't do anything about it as "they would only give me pills and that's no solution"
He once told me that at points he had considered driving his motorbike straight into a concrete wall or a tree.
Anyway, things go fine for ages, he isn't the life and soul tbh but we get on really well. Then he gets down and I'm made to feel that it's my fault for example I am not affectionate enough. That's probably true, but that's my nature and I haven't changed. It's also very difficult when although you love someone, and I genuinely think I do love him, you don't actually like them very much sometimes.
He does lose his temper from time to time but usually just stomps out and goes for a drive. Obviously I feel great about this given his comments from years ago.
Anyway a couple of weekends ago, we had just got back from holidays, he was in a grim mood - as usual, I was blaming myself but also quite angry with him too. He ended up stomping off and I shouted after him "so that'll be my fault as well then" when he was back and he had calmed down he said "I'm depressed, it isn't your fault" I asked him what he was going to do and he repeated that it was a waste of time going to the docs. So I said "so you are depressed and you are not going to do anything then, is that it?" he said he didn't know. I got upset and went off. I stopped short of saying if he didn't then I didn't want to be married any more but that is a conversation that I think we need to have :(
Then things were fine, I got home yesterday after finishing work and picking the kids up and he said he had come home early from work, wasn't going in next week and had made an appointment at the GP.
If he doesn't cancel before then, what will the GP do? will it be medication? I suspect if it is, he simply wont fill the prescription.
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Mental health
OH (finally) going to see GP this week about depression - what to expect?
17 replies
myotherusernameisbetter · 26/07/2014 19:46
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