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Mental health

OCD and post natal depression advice?

4 replies

Lynz1987 · 07/04/2013 01:53

To anyone?
Im totally new to mums net, so don't understand the abbreviations etc. but here goes...
I gave birth to my daughter in December and totally went about the first few weeks of her life the wrong way, chaotically sticking to my old life whilst dealing with a newborn and Xmas. I was foolish and believe this contributed to my PND but have also been diagnosed as an OCD sufferer.
My dr has explained I'm an obsessive thinker/planner. This condition has led to me feeling virtually destroyed when a bad day occurs. A bad day being anything from baby not napping at the right time or even just leaving an oz of milk at a feed.
I could go on about various issues that have cropped up that haven't helped this situation but I don't want to bore!! What I am in fact looking for is others who suffer with PND and OCD and how do you cope? Do you take meds? (I'm currently deciding weather to take Prozac) do you ever feel like a good mum? Or do you just learn to live with the guilt, anxiety and dread?

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AgentZigzag · 07/04/2013 02:30

I have OCD but I've haven't had depression or PND, but me having OCD doesn't really make a difference to how I read what you've written.

I'm only giving you my opinion and I'm not an expert in any way, shape or form, but the expectations you have of how 'things should be' seem to be extraordinarily high.

Which could be what your doctor was trying to say, that if things aren't exactly as you think they should be, then all is not lost and it doesn't mean you're a failure.

If you were feeling more on an even keel you'd be able to rationalise those things that don't work out as you'd like as just a blip in the day and nothing more. Recalling that it's just not possible to have a perfect day and everything go as you think it should do, and it doesn't mean you're a doing it 'wrong' or you've gone about looking after your DD in a way that's detrimental to her.

Accept you've had a life changing event and ease yourself into the very high expectations you might have of how it should be done. In general society, the high expectations of parents are only guidelines because none of us have the recipe of what makes a good parent, we're all just making it up as we go along...well...most of us Grin

What I'm saying in a very round about the houses way is try and relax, (that bit is from my OCD) it's OK to enjoy your DD and everything turn out alright Smile

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Lynz1987 · 07/04/2013 08:56

Thank you for your reply, your right my expectations are too high I just wish I could work on excepting things for what they are. Another bad night of over thinking last night which leads me to watching my DD sleeping on a monitor while I'm awake totally crazy!!
How long have you suffered with OCD?

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AgentZigzag · 07/04/2013 20:38

Sorry you had a crap night last night, not being able to sleep must make things feel so much worse.

I don't want to be intrusive and of course you don't have to answer, but can I ask what kinds of thing are running through your mind when you're watching your DD and unable to sleep?

I was just wondering whether there might be a couple of 'small' anxieties amongst them that you could start trying to think differently about to start chipping away at the brick wall you have stopping you from being able to relax and sleep?

My mum started to notice my OCD when I was about three years old, so it's part of who I am now. Do you think your OCD was brought on by having your DD and all those annoying hormones, or is it something you've always had too?

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surprise11871 · 12/04/2013 15:08

Hi i could have written this post myself. Infact i have just written a post about post natal depression. I had my lo 14 weeks ago n all in all felt i was doing a great job however due to relationship problems i have been feeling low and becoming obsessed about the heating in the house(it doesn't work properly) im worried i won't know whether to put my lo's cardi on or not. I seem to have completely lost my ability to trust my instincts and have been diagnosed with post natal depression and ocd. I do believe i have always slightly had ocd forever things have to be a certain way blinds have to be open in a particular way the house always clean n in a certain order etc. Sorry for hi jacking your post but i was wondering if u are managing and feeling any better and if so if you had some advice that would help me thank you. I hope you are getting some support and i suppose maybe give each other virtual support x

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