My BIL is 31 & has been diagnosed with social-anxiety disorder. I think he's a classic underachiever. Lots going for him, if only he could see it, but as he gets older it's starting to look like his options are running out. He's never held a job for longer than a few months. He either drinks too much or smokes dope too much. ATM it's dope and xbox.
Something happened to him - I don't know what as my dp won't break the confidence and I wouldn't ask him to - and he's seen counsellors etc but stopped going when it got too hard. He also has a pattern of coming off his meds and relapsing. He becomes uncontactable for weeks on end. He has a history of self-harm, though not for a long time as far as I'm aware.
Had a chat with my dp this morning who obviously needed to unload. His parents are increasingly worried about BIL and what will happen to him if he doesn't get sorted. They bailed him out financially a few years ago and have been paying his mortgage since then. They're due to retire soon and won't be able to support him anymore. My dp is wondering if a short sharp shock might be more effective at motivating BIL to take control of his life - ie maybe his parents are enabling BIL to maintain his lifestyle. His gf has stepped back - BIL claims she was impatient with him, couldn't support him - but dp wonders if she feels BIL could do more to help himself.
Does anyone have experience of this sort of thing. Are there any good links I could go to to learn more about this type of situation? I'm very much on the outside looking in but perhaps everyone else is too close think objectively about it.
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Mental health
Is it is possible to help?
5 replies
babanouche · 05/04/2013 13:13
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