Depression - how do you know?

[Dontknow765]

How do you know if you are depressed? I've been on anti-d's before after the kids, but it was mainly because I wasn't coping well & better safe than sorry.

But DC2 is 2 now and I'm feeling very low again. It's hard to know if it situational. I hate my job (can't leave as main breadwinner, though have a longer term exit strategy). We are skint, kids are young, very stressed because I take too much on, want to do too much, constantly comparing myself against others.

Worst thing is I am horrid to the kids. Shouty, crabby, irrationally angry. Yesterday I through stickle bricks which was not my finest hour.

I'm tired all the time, even with adequate sleep.

But how do you know if it is depression or just tough times? What should I do? I can't change a lot of what is bothering me, job, money, kids. I feel out of control.

[Sparklingbrook]

Hello Dont, sorry to hear you are struggling.. I think with anti depressants they take the rough edges off things. So although nothing can be changed they help you cope better with your lot if that makes sense?

Did the ADs work for you before?

[Dontknow765]

Yes they did work but about 7 months or so ago I took myself off them without going to the dr. I for some reason felt a burning need not to be on them anymore & I can't remember why. When my dr found out he was a bit worried but I was all "it's my body I know what's right" (in my head, not too the dr!). But I am ashamed to admit it might have been a mistake.

[fuzzpig]

You do sound depressed. You can be depressed purely from the situation (reactive depression I think it's called?) - it sounds very stressful.

Maybe ADs are worth a try again, but maybe counselling would help more?

[Sparklingbrook]

No, don't be ashamed. I know what you mean. I have recently come off Citalopram and lasted precisely 6 weeks and now I am back on a low dose again. I suppose I wanted to be off them but it wasn't the right time this time.

If I were you I would have another chat with the GP.

[fuzzpig]

Lots of people take themselves off ADs - it's not ideal, but you are certainly not the first to make that mistake!

When I've done it, it's usually been because the AD has made me feel really spaced out.

Also, remember there are lots of types of ADs, that work in different ways, and therefore are suited to different people. For me, SSRIs are useless (just space me out) but I am having some success with a tricyclic.

[Dontknow765]

How do you know what is the right AD? I think I just felt a bit flat on fluoxetine.

I have had some counselling through work but it sort of came to a natural end.

[fuzzpig]

I guess just because you start to feel better.

I'm actually on a low dose of amitriptyline (a tricyclic) for its painkilling properties rather than as an AD, but have noticed that it is improving my mood slightly despite some very shitty circumstances, and I'm not feeling all detached like I have done on other types.

[Sparklingbrook]

The GP just suggested Citalopram and it worked for me. She asked if I wanted to try another this time round but I said i would stick with it.

[1805]

Sparkling - can I just ask a quick question please - sorry to hijack op.

I have just weaned myself off citalopram, v gradually and with drs ok. However, I have been feeling quite dizzy and v light headed since. Is this something you experienced? It's been approx 1 week since last 10mg dose.

OP - I would say a little bit of medication again may help. Depends if you feel strong or not! With a 2 yr old, I would go back for meds!!!!!

[Sparklingbrook]

I did feel a bit like that 1805, a funny feeling and those 'head zap' things, I was on 10mg before I stopped too. I think I may have reduced too quickly looking back.

I did feel all ok for a few weeks, but for some reason after 6 weeks I recognised the anxiety creeping back,

[Dontknow765]

Thanks for the replies. Much appreciated.

[Sparklingbrook]

Good luck Dont, hope you are feeling happier soon. x

[1805]

Thanks Sparkling. yes 'head zap' - I know what you mean. Will keep tabs on myself for the next few weeks.

[Sparklingbrook]

I'm so glad you knew what I meant 1805 It's hard to describe isn't it?

I think you will know if things aren't right again. I was disappointed but I knew.