How often do you cry?

[fisil]

It suddenly struck me that in the 10 months since I've been on ADs I haven't cried once. Before that I used to cry a lot - certainly every week. At the worst it would be several times a day. And that was throughout my teens and adulthood, even times when everything was going fine. I thought it was normal to cry a lot, but now I think that maybe it wasn't and that I could have got help sooner.

I'm really glad that I have got help, so I'm not having a moan. Instead I'm saying this because if anyone else cries a lot I reckon you don't have to.

[anorak]

It's not a bad thing to cry, is it? It helps you express your feelings instead of bottling them up. The problem comes when you're crying too often, which would indicate a big sadness or a depression for which the ADs may well help.

IMO ADs do not cure anything, but they give you a break from an exhausting depression or grief - a chance to gather yourself and build yourself up while you get over a critical time in your life. If there is crying to do it will come out when you stop taking the ADs - hopefully at a time when you've rested and got ready to face the feelings again.

Sounds as if ADs are working very well for you.

[fisil]

I think it's good to cry too. I completely agree. And I haven't changed my view on that. Which I guess is why it came as a shock to me to realise that in the past 10 months I haven't cried once!

[NASWM]

I'm excatly the opposite to this. I don't know how to cry, but so wish I did. I am going through a very low patch, which I am trying to do something about, and often wonder if a good sob would help. But how do you change a lifetime tradition??

So pleased you are doing okay fisil

[Lonelymum]

Oh dear, I cry frequently. I don't know if it is a bad thing or not. I think when I cry because I am stressed, then it is bad, but I don't think it is bad to cry when you hear a sad story or something similar. On those occasions I am proud to be able to express my emotions. Dh can't, and I don't think it is healthy.

[WigWamBam]

I didn't cry much when I was on ADs, but that was because I wasn't actually feeling anything - they made me numb.

I cry a lot, more often than is probably good for me, and part of that is depression - but for me it feels more healthy than the numbness and non-feeling that I had before.

I'm so glad that you feel the ADs have helped you, fisil, and brought you to a better place in your life.

[anorak]

NASWM, is there really nothing that makes you cry? Not even if you imagined some really terrible thing? If there is just one thing that does, you could think about it and use it to get you started and perhaps open the floodgates, if you thing it would be therapeutic?

[NASWM]

Well yes, I often feel like I could cry at happy soppy things, eg at the kids nativity, but usually mange to stop myself. I think I've become numb to crying for sorrow. It was my coping mechanism for so long and now is a way of life. There have been times when I have ran away from things becuase I thought I was going to cry. I dont know why. Probably because I don't know what would happen if I let myself go. I wish I could change though. I know it is not healthy.

[FrannytheQuinoaEater]

I used to cry frequently but since having ds I feel much more balanced. I used to have great highs and lows, and thought that having extremes of emotion was quite desirable, and that I would miss it if thing changed. I don't

I think being an emotional person and expressing sadness through tears is healthy, but not feeling great sadness all the time for no good reason.

[sophynoo]

Havent cried for a couple of years..dont like people to see me cry and it always seems "girlie" and weak..i get annoyed with women who cry over the slightest little thing, it just makes you appear a bit pathetic i think

[4blue1pink]

I must cry too much then and be weak!

[Lonelymum]

In my defence, I don't cry in public! or would be mortified if I did.

But I don't see crying as weak and girlie. I find the sight of someone crying incredibly moving in itself and would definitely warm to anyone I saw crying.

[albosmum]

I cry loads and much more since i have had children. Also I cry at the news, tv programmes, converstions i have had converstaions i will have. I don't think I'm depressed but its just the way i am.
I cry in public, private, in front of children, dh etc.. - i think i must be very weak

[blueteddy]

Message withdrawn

[Lonelymum]

No you aren't albosmum, you are emotional. I really don't see why society insists on equating the showing of emotions as weakness.

[blueteddy]

Message withdrawn

[WigWamBam]

No, I don't see why tears are equated with weakness and being pathetic, either. There is nothing wrong with showing emotions, either in public or in private - it's healthier than bottling it all up.

[littlemissbossy]

Since having children I've become a real cry-baby. I cry at things on the news - here's a story recently covered on TV and it was so lovely it I cried - I couldn't help myself

[helsi]

I cry all the time. Anything can set it off and as I am prone to depression the little things can set it off depending on my mood that day.

[NASWM]

Crying is definitely not a weakness or girlie, in my mind. I WISH I could do it. I agree with Blueteddy about going out of the way to control emotions in public. Butl I control it private and with family as well. I'm sure it's not healthy. That is why peope see me as 'strong' which I'm not.

NOT crying in public about certain things and at certain times is often regarded as insensitive. I'd like to think I am very sensitive, but just cant cry. Maybe one day the floodgates will open.. Then I'd be worried they wouldn;t stop though...