Firstly let me apologise, I'm afraid I'm one of those regular posters who has changed their name, I know quite a few people from here in RL and I just couldn't face them knowing this.
I've always had OCD type tendancies but just lived with it, I remember being 8 and hearing sounds in my bedroom (just usual clicks etc nothing spooky) and thinking that if I stared at the spot where the noise had come from for a count of 10 then everything would be alright. However, since I've had Dd, who is now 13 months, it seems to have got steadily worse.
It has got to the stage that, last night, it took me three hours to get to bed. I've become paranoid about the gas being on, so I check umpteen times and even have little rhymes I've concocted to help me check (I know, it's crazy). I stand in Dd's bedroom door listening to her breath but I'll stand there for 30 minutes as I always think 'well that breath was ok, but what if she doesn't breath after that one?' If she coughs or murmers in the night then I have to get up and go through it all again. I've even got paranoid about Dh's breathing and am staying awake to check he's ok. If I take my glasses off to go to sleep I check them constantly incase for some reason they have broken. Every time I get in the car I have vivid mental images of crashing and I have them whilst driving too, I've had to pull over and literally shake them out of my head before now.
Dh has started to notice and I'm trying to make a joke out of it but it just isn't funny, what started off as easy tohandle has become out of control, it's taking over my life.
What on earth do I do? Do I need to talk to someone? If I did would it show up anywhere (I'm worried about my employers)? How much would it cost, we have no money?
Thank you for reading this, if you've got this far, it turned out more rambling than I thought
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.
Mental health
Please help me, I think I may need to see a shrink :(
20 replies
Millymon · 23/01/2006 16:12
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.