Baby blues or P.N.D??

[bonkerz]

DD is 3 weeks old today and i cant beleieve how im feeling.
I feel so low. I cant feel happy and in fact i cant feel any sort of emotion. The elation i felt when she was born and i first held her has gone. I know i love her but im numb when i look at her. I feel like im just going through the motions on a day to day basis and the lack of sleep is not helping. I hit an all time low last night and left her screaming in the lounge because i was terrified i would hurt her. I hate myself for feeling like this because this little girl is the result of a long time of trying to have a baby. We lost 2 babies before we had our angel and i hate that i cant feel happy.

Please tell me im normal! I never had anything like this when i had DS 5 years ago. I have health visitor coming tomorrow, should i talk to her or go to doctors? Im terrified by the way im feeling.

[bonkerz]

bump

[mumatuks]

If you feel you can talk to your health visitor when she comes tomorrow you must.

If you don't feel you can approach her (I certainly didn't with DS1's HV, but DS2's HV is lovely) you must go to your Dr.

I completely understand that feeling of numbness you are talking about. I was recently diagnosed with mild PND, and went down the route of counciling instead of AD's. It is three months since now, and I'm getting much better. You are welcome to CAT me if you would like to talk.

mumatuks. x

[mummytosteven]

Sorry you are feeling so bad. I honestly can't say whether this is PND or whether it's just the combination of sleep deprivation and crying baby that's making you feel down atm, but I think you should chat to HV tomorrow, and then look at getting a GP appointment after that. Don't be terrified; I am sure we have all had the most irrational thoughts because we are desperate for a baby to just stop crying. If it is PND, rather than just a bad patch, there are various things than can help, ranging from more rest/better eating/more fresh air to counselling to medication.

Best of luck

[blueteddy]

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[bonkerz]

My health visitor is due tomorrow so will talk to her. I know Dh is really worried and TBH so am I. I have had alot to deal with recently and think its all caught up with me really. Also lost my mum in October which makes looking at my little girl even harder because i cant help thinking how much my mum would have loved her

[blueteddy]

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[Nemo1977]

hunny you have had soo much happen in the past year and a bit with your mum and the babies etc that you are bound to feel low. AS i have said before it does sound like depression whether it is pnd or depression generally the treatment is still the same. Please talk to your hv as it is essential to get help asap. You put a lot of pressure on yourself to do certain things a way you percieve that they should have been done that you arent giving yourself any slack if they go wrong. Your start with dd hasnt been the easiest by any means so please try to take it easy. Will be around to chat when you are up to it.

[blueteddy]

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[mumatuks]

oh you poor love, you've been through so much. No wonder you're up and down with your emotions.

I know where you are coming from about losing your mum. I lost my mum a few years ago now, but I do still think of her and wonder what she'd think of her 2 grandsons.

Your DH sounds supportive if he has noticed your feelings. Can he take DD out on a walk whilst you have a shower / bath take a moment to "be yourself"??

All I can think of is keep messaging on here for now and talk about everything and anything that helps. please see your HV too. x