Daily practice for music, and anything else...

[ragged]

DD protesting about music practice.
She points out that I don't make her regularly practise other weekly EC activities at home (Judo, gymnastics and horse riding).

Does she have a point? Should she practise those other things at home regularly, too? Or is music the only case where I should demand that she practise?

TIA.

[frakkinnakkered]

Judo and horse-riding can't be practised safely at home!

Gymnastics it depends how advanced she is and what she can safely do without supervision. It's not necessary but from the age of about 7 or 8 I was doing stretches and balance practice at home. How many gym sessions a week does she do?

[Katisha]

Yes because you physically can't improve enough if you only do it once a week, you will get frustrated at lack of progress and give up. Learning an instrument is not easy, not quick and not necessarily instinctive. You have to be disciplined and stick at it(which is why so many people give up.) You will never get any further on in the lessons either.

You have to train your fingers, hands, arms to hold the instrument and play it. Plus learning to actually read the music and translate it into your fingers. It would be like saying you only need read once a week.

That said we only usually manage about 5 days a week here. sometimes 4. But weekly is absilutely pointless and a waste of money.

[Mumi]

I don't see how practising judo kata alone is any different from practising gymnastics, presuming the same amount of floor cushioning is used (and in fact I would say it is necessary for any martial artist to get to a good standard).

[ragged]

I know a family where the kids regularly practise judo moves on any unsuspecting sibling or parent at home. :). And DD ends up showing off her Judo moves at school (officially not allowed, but they do it anyway).

Hmmm.... several years of lessons now, and DD hasn't lose interest in music lessons, in spite of little improvement. I reckon she is satisfied with the mere status of musical learner, not at all bothered about achieving anything.

But it feels like wasted money to me to let her do music just "for fun".

[ragged]

Oh sorry, Frak...rd -- she only does one gym session a week, started only a month ago and has missed 2/4 sessions. I am unimpressed with her level of commitment, frankly.

[snorkie]

How old is she ragged? She does kind of have a point I think, in that if you are prepared to fork out for horse riding lessons, presumably just for fun & without the expectation that she will become a high flying jockey or something, then why not music lessons?

Of course if you are the one who is paying, then you do have the right to set conditions on the lessons, but I think it would be reasonable to say that if she doesn't want to practise then she gives up one of her other activities instead as you are only prepared to fund so many 'fun' activities that she isn't going to take seriously.

I do think there is a place for music lessons for fun & without practice - children do make some slow progress and do occasionally come around to the idea of practising themselves eventually - but it's an expensive approach and not unreasonable for parents (and music teachers) not to tolerate it.

[frakkinnakkered]

Assuming the DD in question doesn't have a partner for kata though? I meant the same sense as the bit about practising on unsuspecting family members! Judo can't be practises solo the same way music or gym can.

And IME my gymnastics coach was telling me to do stuff outside sessions at a much earlier stage than I was ever told to for martial arts anyway, but after 2 sessions it's not necessary unless you really want to push yourself!

So overall YANBU to insist on music but not the others.

[Katisha]

Which instrument are we talking about?

[ragged]

Katisha: Group lessons in school for piano (since May) and Violin (3+years!). I only started to insist on practice in May.

It's a lot of money I'm forking out so I'd like to see progress. I can see good progress in her riding & Judo, even though she doesn't practice at home, but nothing re Violin and iffy re piano.

I think I'll tell DD that music is harder work to progress than the other activities -- that's why she must practise at home.

ta, I think I've finally worked it out for myself!

[Katisha]

Ah...was hoping it would be flute or clarinet, which are a bit easier to make progress on at first than violin and piano. They really are the instruments you have to do a reasonable amount of practice on, unfortunately!
Maybe lose one of them? If you have a piano at home stick with piano maybe? You can play that on your own, but with violin you need to get good enough to join an orchestra, or have someone play piano accompaniment for you.

[Drayford]

When my DD was young (5 - 10) she practiced 5-10 minutes a day max (violin & Piano) and progressed to 15 minutes or so when she switched to viola aged 11. She's nearly 19 now and practices 2 hours a day (singing) and about an hour a day (viola) and sporadic piano pratice. In my experience, start small and if your DD does continue, gently encourage her to up her practice. If she does progress and plays in ensembles and performs, practice will be essential.

DS, on the other hand, started playing the trumpet aged 9 and never practiced. He gave up aged 12 and is now (16) an accomplished guitarist - mainly self taught. It's amazing now much he practices now he's performing and playing for money!!!

I do take your DD's point about not practicing for other activities - but I don't think there's a magic answer sadly!