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Ethical dilemmas

My son's friend takes cocaine and I have found out! Do I tell his parents?

13 replies

mollyblack57 · 24/02/2013 21:52

I am extremely concerned about some texts I found on my son's phone recently. He was talking to his friend (he has known him for about 6 months. I have never met him) and telling him not to use drugs as his is doing (cocaine!!). I confronted my son about this and although concerned said it wasnt his business. He seems to think that is ok. I told him that if I were his parents I would want to know. I do not know the boy or his parents but fear as any parent would about the consequences of drug taking. I thought about talking to school (they are both 17 and a few boys appear to be taking serious drugs in their year) and telling them to do some extra PSHE without being too specific? Any advice would be welcome. My husband says we should not interfere but this goes against the grain with me. I do however stand a very high chance of losing my son's confidence in me as he will never forgive me if I took action owing to the fact that his friend would be so upset with him.

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AKissIsNotAContract · 24/02/2013 22:00

I think you should stay out of it. Many teens experiment with drugs, he'll probably grow out of it without his parents ever knowing.

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usualsuspect · 24/02/2013 22:03

I don't think you should tell his parents. Why were you looking at your sons texts?

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mollyblack57 · 24/02/2013 22:12

Cocaine is serious. He has a dealer! I feel that I have some sense of responsibility as a parent. I might be the only 'grown up' that knows! What if something awful happened to the poor lad?
PS I never look at my sons texts normally...I just had a hunch that something wasnt right. Serves me right and wish I hadnt now!

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AKissIsNotAContract · 25/02/2013 06:58

His 'dealer' is most likely another kid in his class. Butt out, it's none of your business.

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thesnootyfox · 25/02/2013 07:59

Tell the school but not the parents.

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babiesinslingseathair · 07/05/2013 13:35

Look, when I was a teenager I did many silly things including taking class As. So did DH. Neither set of parents found out and nor did they have to.

Keep your nose out.

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AliciaGunther · 09/05/2013 13:06

I am someone that used to take cocaine. It was very good and I came out a smarter person.

You can't trust the system!

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PosyNarker · 09/05/2013 13:19

If he was 14 absolutely, but as he's 17 I'd say mind your business. You have no idea how his parents might react and the repercussions could be worse than occasional class A use.

At least you can see your own son isn't interested in it.

I was never into it myself but plenty of friends went through a period of trying different drugs & going clubbing. Not one developed a habit and I don't know any who still do it now we're in our 30s.

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GingerJulep · 16/06/2013 13:35

Going against the grain here... would tell someone. School would probably depend on the particular reaction expected. Expulsion might not be in the child's (and at 17 he is still a child) best interests. Police also an option... but not the most subtle perhaps!

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cece · 16/06/2013 13:38

I can't believe how many people are saying not to tell his parents! I think you should. I would certainly want to know if he were mine.

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ohforfoxsake · 16/06/2013 13:40

I'd want to know.

They are at school. Who is to say drugs aren't being sold to younger children? If they were adults, away from the parental home, away from younger children, I wouldn't give a fuck. But this isn't the case. It's happening in a school.

We all have a responsibility to all children. The school should be told. Discreetly.

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AKissIsNotAContract · 16/06/2013 13:41

Well as this thread is 4 months old I wonder what the OP did in the end.

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AmberLeaf · 16/06/2013 13:45

It's happening in a school

Where does it say that?

I very much doubt anything is happening in school tbh.

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