I think I have to phone social services

(4 Posts)
UnfortunatelyNotAMummy Mon 30-Jul-12 20:52:26

I will change a few minor bits because its important no one recognises me.

Someone i know has custody of 2 children that aren't hers, the are family. One of the kids has been in care previously in different circumstances. Soial services have been monitoring them but are backing off now.

I've recently found out that the main care giver has been staying out a lot over night leaving the kids with an adult family member but not one I think would know what to do in an emergancy, would probably struggle to manage his own life.

They all drink too much but the kids have trainers that are falling apart etc.

The kids don't get hurt but i couldn't forgive myself if they ever did. I also don't like the way the kids get spoken to, told they are naughty just to get a reaction and just constantly winding them up.

The kids appear mainly happy but they don't know any different. I have tried to help previously but i get ignored or lied to so i don't ask questions. I live too far away to 'call in'.

UnfortunatelyNotAMummy Mon 30-Jul-12 20:56:58

Posted too soon sorry for mistakes, i'm on my phone. Basically should i phone social sevices? I really just don't want them to back off. They still need SS calling in to keep things going I think and remind them how things should be done.

Main care giver had a dysfunctional upbriging (i know some people can come through that and be fine) and i don't think she knows whats 'normal' for a family.

Should I phone SS to ask for more support for her? Will the kids get taken away?

Tia

blabalalalablabla Mon 30-Jul-12 21:05:49

I think what you have to do is to put yourselves in the childs shoes and think what would it be like to be a child in this family. If they are kinship carers then social services should be aware of what their needs are, but I think it sounds as if there should perhaps be other agencies involved as part of the handing down from social services - ie childrens charities/childrens centre outreach etc.

Would you want your child to be living like the children in the family? If the answer is no then I think you have a duty to make a call.

The children won't get taken away as a direct result of your intervention. other factors would always be considered and I think that social services give plenty of opportunity to allow families to demonstrate how competent they can be as parents.

UnfortunatelyNotAMummy Mon 30-Jul-12 21:14:09

Thanks for your reply. No i wouldn't want any of my children (when i have them) to live like that.

If they do get taken i'd want to look after them but couldn't afford the child care but i suppose i should think about that if it happens. We both work but none of them ever have.

i think i'll phone SS tomorrow and try and speak to the person who normally deals with them.

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