Lasing power of attorney choices

[essexisnotallitseems]

This is difficult - my MIL (100% working mentally) wants to set up two lasting powers of attorney - the financial one and the health/wellbeing one.

She has asked my husband and BIL (her two sons) to be attorneys for the health and wellbeing one, and her "financial advisor" to be the financial one.

We've never met the financial advisor - we know his name but nothing else. He is someone my deceased FIL employed to do tax returns, and he's remained involved with my MIL's finances since. She has a yearly meeting with him and representatives from her bank so we assume he is bona fide!

But, I am uncomfortable with a stranger potentially being able to control her finances - am I over-thinking this? DH thinks it's her choice. If it were MY mother I could have a conversation with her about how I feel, he's not really willing to do this with her. Its none of my business, is it?

[WestmorlandSausage]

I would remind her that managing finances under POA isn't just about the big financial decisions but also the little ones like paying bills, arranging home care should she need it, going to the bank for her etc.

Is the financial advisor really going to be in the position to do that?

She could arrange for her sons to also be put on as POA for finances as well, with the specification that they deal with the day to day stuff and but any bigger decisions such as investments continue to be dealt with by the financial advisor.

But it is really up to her.

[Needmoresleep]

Th8s would set alarm bells ringing for me as well. Will the Financial Adviser be entitled to charge fees. (Allowable as long as written into the original POA.) Presumably he would control what would be available for care home fees etc. How 9ld is he? Who would be alternate should he be incapacitated. How will he know what is in her best interest if he does not see her often. (My mum got signed up for 5 year stock market linked bonds because her banks financial adviser did not spot the early signs of dementia. )

Will there be scope for whichever brother takes on the larger share of care to be compensated for costs. (It sounds mean but sorting out the aftermath of a health crisis including home move, setting up a care package etc can cost a lot especially if you live some distance away. Irritating if the money is there but you cant be compensated because a financial adviser disagrees.

What would happen if the financial adviser lost the money?

Lots of issues. Could you suggest that your MIL and her sons possibly with the Financial Adviser meet with the Solicitor drawing up the POA and discuss scenarios and how the might work. Some arrangement that had an account for paying day to day bills controlled by one/either/both brothers but with a commitment that the Financial Adviser is used for key investment advice as long as he is still a professional IFA and covered by regulations and insurance.

[essexisnotallitseems]

Thanks for the responses.

It's not a financial adviser per se, he's a tax consultant.

DH is coming round to the idea that having one person, who doesn't live near and only sees MIL once a year having complete control of finances is not necessarily a good idea and will suggest he/BIL or both are co-attorneys especially because of the day-to-day stuff which may be required.

MIL is meeting with solicitors on Tuesday and I'm hoping they will also advise this. She has asked DH what MY parents have done (they have reciprocal powers for each other at the moment).

it's all made more difficult because her reluctance to see either of her sons as adults - despite both having responsible jobs, and being fathers themselves!

[Needmoresleep]

A reluctance to trust adult children, when actually they are as competent/knowledgeable as professional advisers, is not uncommon.

My view following my own experience as an Attorney, where there significant assets to manage and a level of family discord, is that it would have been very valuable to have been able to sit down at the start with my mother's solicitor and others involved and talk about how we wanted things to work, checks and balances etc, and ensure Attorney documents were suitably drafted.

An Attorney is potentially criminally liable, yet can only get later legal advice at their own expense.

An arrangement where one is responsible for ensuring good care levels whilst another holds the purse strings sounds mad. I would push for your husband to meet your mothers solicitor as well to get advice on the responsibilities he will take on and how he will access the means to do this.

[whataboutbob]

I absolutely second NMS. Being POA can be quite time consuming even if you have sole power. Organising an elderly person s care will requir e prompt access to finances. I can t see how splitting the functions in 2 can work unless there is very close cooperation and trust.

[essexisnotallitseems]

MIL's solicitors were very helpful and pointed out the potential pitfalls (which DH had also done, but when it came from someone "official" she was willing to listen)

It may have helped matters - apparently she kept saying "oh my son mentioned that..." so to have DH's opinions confirmed by a solicitor has meant he's gone up in her estimation.

DH and BIL on both powers of attorney, financial chap still under contract to do whatever he does now (investment planning and tax returns I think) and of course if necessary could be paid to do more if necessary.

Thanks for the help!