88 year old GM-what do I do???

[everythingsgoingsouth]

will try and keep to the point.
GM always been a manipulative person, stirs trouble,sarcastic,makes illnesses and diseases up .I'm the only one in family who has anything to do with her now. last 6 months she has however become really forgetful, then accuses those around (mainly me and the home help) of changing things in her house/hiding things/breaking things when it is in fact she who has done these things but forgotten.she shouts,leaves nasty telephone messages, then threatens suicide "so then you'll all be happy" She has told the home help not to tell me anything that goes on, luckily we have a good relationship so we collaborate!
she lives by herself, there is no way she could live with me, and there is no-one else who would have her .Physically she is in good health, though she tells people she has all sorts wrong with her.Luckily every so often she lets me go into gp with her so I get updated by dr !
she has a mortgaged flat,not much savings.

so, what do I do to get her help? homehelp does shopping and transport jobs.She does everything else herself. its the memory/moods/aggression/paranoia she needs help with.
I phoned SS this week, am waiting for someone to call me back.

what happens in these situations please?

[CMOTDibbler]

You need to speak to her GP and they should do a memory test and see if she has dementia. Unfortunatly paranoia and anger at others is very common in people with dementia