Maths teacher called my Ds a pain in the arse.

[dingit]

Granted, he can be.
He met my Dd on Friday, and said 'I teach your brother, he is the pain in my arse. '

Is it just me that thinks that that is totally unprofessional?

[jennycoast]

I think it would have been one thing to say that to you at a parents evening e.g., but is completely different and very wrong to say it to your DD.

[bigTillyMint]

Hmmm, very unprofessional, but I wouldn't be surprised if teachers said the same thing to my DD

[curlew]

How old?

[Morgause]

It was a joke FFS.

[PeriodMath]

Unprofessional, yes.

But my main concern now would be to get to the bottom of why your DS is the pain in his teacher's arse. Your "granted he can be" is a bit glib.

[LizzieVereker]

I might say to a student "stop being a pain in the bum!" in a jokey way, but I would never say arse, and I would NEVER comment on a student to their sibling. That's a bit unprofessional IMO.

[SnapesOnAPlane]

Is your DS a teenager?
Sounds like a cheeky comment to make your DD smile to me.

[Lancelottie]

Yes, it's unprofessional, especially unleavened by a 'but...'.

Last parent's eve, the physics teacher said of DS, 'He's an irritating little bugger... but you can't help liking him, ' which seemed more than fair.

How accurate is your DD's reporting, generally?

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

Not good to say it to your DD about her brother, but fair enough as a general comment I think!

[emilialuxembourg]

What's more important to you - challenging this teacher's unprofessional comment or finding out what sort of behaviour your son is displaying in this lesson? I would be mortified if my child was a pain in the arse at school

[QuiteContent]

Yep for what it's worth as a mumsnet newbie (a bloke at that, sorry), I'm with Emilia above. Yes it's a bit off, even if meant in a lighthearted way, and some people could well take offence but I'd be more worried about what would make that the first thing to pop into the teacher's mind when he thought of him.

[deleted203]

I'd be more concerned about the fact that my child was being a pain in the arse than the comment, personally. I would be FAR more annoyed at my child's behaviour than the teacher's language. In our house it would be DS who was getting the bollocking - rather than complaining to the school.

[maja00]

A bit unprofessional, but I'd be more concerned about my child being a PITA than the comment.

[TwllBach]

Where I work, a TA was pulled up and given an official warning for talking about a child in the class that she was working in to a sibling of said child and saying "he is a bit naughty, he won't sit on the mat" so we definitely wouldn't dare say anything like that, albeit we are primary and I assume this was secondary?

I still wouldn't say anything other than "Oh yes, I know X" or something silly like, "gosh well I hope you are as lovely as he is!"

[ChippingInHopHopHop]

It wouldn't bother me at all (that he said it) but it would bother me A LOT that he needed to say it and I would be finding out if it was the truth or just a wee joke with DD... why are people so easily offended these days - are you kids really made of glass?

[ChippingInHopHopHop]

Twl yet another reason I'm so very glad I didn't go into teaching. MN makes me glad of that most days in one way or another!

[Bowlersarm]

I don't think I take things seriously enough, maybe. That would just make me laugh.

[dingit]

Ds has not got on very well this year at all in maths. He started life in the top set, after they tested him. He got demoted to set 2 and now is a the bottom of that. We have been emailing school regularly about the quality of his work.

Maybe he meant I was the pita!

However on parents evening, we were given reasonable feedback on him. His last test result was bad. What to do? I don't feel it will be worth tackling it again this close to the end of term.

And yes dd is honest and tells a straight story!

[lljkk]

What bowlerarm & chippinginhophophop said.

[yabyum]

We have been emailing school regularly about the quality of his work.

And what have you been saying to your DS? Is he taking any responsibility?

[dingit]

Yes and no. It's a bit like flogging a dead horse. He's had his x box taken away for a while, and if his school report is bad, it will be removed on week days in the autumn term. We are really trying our best!

[noblegiraffe]

Will he have a new teacher in September? If yes, I'd leave the whole arse thing be, it's very easy to say thoughtless things in this weather and at the end of term.

I'd suggest a fresh start in September too, assume he is going to start well rather than badly. What reward will he get for a good report?

[AcrylicPlexiglass]

I think it's fine. He was either joking or being honest. Either is fine.

My children are all massive pains in the arse. Any teacher who turns up for their lessons and those of their equally annoying friends has my sympathy and admiration. Any teacher who seems to like or encourage them despite the fact they are complete pitas has my undying gratitude. I would not object in the slightest if the teachers quite honestly pointed out that they are utter pains in the arse. My response on such occasions is to agree, sympathise, ask if punishment at home is needed etc.

[SlangWhanger]

The teacher sounds unprofessional and immature. I wouldn't mind My DCs being called a pain in context but a to say in front of a sibling is stupid.

[TwllBach]

AcrylicPlexiglass you might be my new favourite person ever