"Average" report - I know I shouldn't be disappointed, but i am...

[Frieda]

Just got ds's first school report from his new school ? and there's nothing wrong with it. Everything is graded A-E for effort and 1-5 for attainment, and he's got straight C3s. Oh, except for Art, where he scores a B. I know I should be reassured that he's reaching the required standard for everything (he's year 2), and he seems happy enough at school, but on the other hand I suppose it's natural to anticipate your child coming home with a glowing testimony to his outstanding fantasticness, and a bit of a bump down to earth when you learn he's merely "average". It doesn't help that there's no comment from the teacher on the report, either - you just get a bald list of letters and numbers. The comment, I suppose, comes on parents' evening in a couple of weeks' time.

I can understand, to some extent, teachers probably have a class of 30 parents expecting their child to excell - at least in some area, and that's not always the reality - but I'm not sure I understand the point of a report like this.

(Sorry, bit of a moan. I'm just feeling a bit deflated about this)

[auntymandy]

We all want little einesteins dont we..but in reality there arent that many and the ones that are have little personality,
His happiness is the mainthing imo.
dont show your dissapointment! as if!
Is he doing his best..thats all we can ask for

[LIZS]

He's unlikely to be given exceptional marks this early in the academic year/. If you are disappointed or surprised ask the teacher against what criteria he was judged. Chances are she/he would have given that to the majority and adjusted up /down by exception only.

[homemama]

Try not to be disappointed but perhaps try and encourage him towards 'Bs' for effort. What you'll probably find in that parents eve is a chance to discuss things more indepth so ask then what he'd need to do to move up. Can you help with anything etc. You may find his teacher doesn't give any 1s or As and that those who always do their best get B2s.

I agree, a comment of some sort would have been nice, if only to put his grading into context. Hopefully you'll find his summer report far more detailed.

Also, he may not have settled in with this particular teacher yet.

[ScummyMummy]

Do you think the Cs for effort are accurate? Maybe he is brilliant but could try harder?!

[Blandmum]

As they say, half of all children are below average!

I wouldn't worry....in the end we might like our children to be brilliant, but we'd rather they were happy , healthy and nice wouldn't we?

I'm a teacher and if I had to choose between kids who were nice and those who were brilliant I'd choose nice every time.....and I am quite the nerd myself

[Frieda]

Thank you for your input, auntymandy, LizS and homemama ? yes, I know you're right, and I mustn't let him sense any disappointment on my part. It just seems a shame that there isn't any more personal comment on the report. I know teachers have loads of paperwork to do, etc, etc, but I know there'll be friends of his that will have got the odd D or E and they will possibly sense parental disappointment, and what's that going to achieve? And, yes, he does have bags of personality, which I keep reminding myself is more important in the long run.

[Frieda]

martianbishop and scummymummy. That's cheered me up!

[SoupDragon]

You know he's not average, clearly the teacher was simply mistaken

[HuggyBear]

I dont pay much attention to school reports and grading to be honest, I dont believe that exams are a good indicator of intelligence either - all they prove is that someone has a good memory and dont suffer from exam stress

[Blandmum]

It is daft isn't it? I teach myself, yet heart of hearts I go into a parent teacher meeting with my kid's teachers and desparatly want to be told that they are Einstien with the heart of Mother Theresa, the grace of Margot Fontaine and the language skills of Shakespere, that they dash off a sonet whilst singing an aria from Don Giovani.

And I am always strangly disapointed

damn teachers never see talent when it is staring them in the face

[Socci]

Message withdrawn

[Wallace]

It always disappoints me when there is no personal comment - it isn't that you want your ds to be brilliant, you'd just like the teacher to know (and appreciate) him for who he is

[homemama]

Teachers are the worse parents to see on parents evening!
They don't care about the allocated 15mins and they want to analyse everything.
Mind you, when it's my turn, I won't be leaving until they've told me he's going to be P.M!

[skinnycow]

I think what you're feeling is perfectly natural Frieda and to be honest its quite refreshing to hear someone say "my kid is average"

I feel terrible because I would accept an "average" report for ds but not dd (who appears far more intelligent than her db but in reality both attained similar grades at KS1 SATS)

We parents really are quite a funny bunch arent we