How do I separate / divorce??

[chubbychipmonk]

So have been married for only 3 years, been together 7 & have 2 DC under age 5. We live in a bought house with a mortgage.

TBH we should never have got married in the first place, we are totally incapable of getting on, he blames me for 99% of our problems, shouts, yells & swears at me, yet is never to blame. The list goes on.

We have now decided to end the marriage. He won't move out however as he won't leave the DC although I think deep down he knows it's inevitable.I have no clue how to even go about untangling our lives together, what should I be doing? What do I need to do? How long can I expect a divorce to take from start to finish? Any practical advice?

I think if I went back to work full time I could just afford to keep the house on my own (I really don't want to sell it). What does he have to pay with regard to child maintenance?
Any practical help, advice, assistance greatly appreciated. Am scared!

[chubbychipmonk]

Should add that I am in Scotland, I know the divorce procedure is slightly different here.

[bella1968]

Hi chubbychipmonk have a look at this website and also //www.scotcourts.gov.uk

www.adviceguide.org.uk/scotland/relationships_s/relationships_relationship_problems_s/ending_a_marriage_scotland.htm

If you start there and google anything about divorce that should give you a good starting point. As you have children you will have to proceed down the 'ordinary route' have a look at the websites it will explain this.

Depending upon whether your husband kicks up a fuss you might be able to do it undefended as long as you and your h can agree on the reasons for divorce and also what to do with assets and arrangements for the children. Obviously an undefended divorce costs a whole lot less than a defended one and from what I've read there's no point in defending a divorce it's just more money in the solicitors pockets, so try to agree on the reasons.

good luck