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Divorce/separation

small moan (am I being unreasonable?)

2 replies

friendlyanimal · 23/07/2013 00:49

I am living with a man who is going through a divorce (long story, but he has been separated for 14 years, remained faithful, seen the children grow up and now finally wanting to start to live his own life, we have been together for a year). Things have been going well for us, extremy happy, both glad to find someone to share the second half of our lives. I have been divorced for 5 years and I think I understand some of the things my man is going through. I have tried to be supportive without being intrusive or know-all. He gets quite panicky about the legal and financial side and can be quite illogical. I try to talk things through with him and together we had made notes for him to refer to during meetings with mediator and soon-to-be-ex-wife and for meetings with his solicitor. Mediation is now finished but my man doesnt seem to understand that he cannot change things agreed at mediation. I went with him (at his request) to a meeting with his solicitor. Both solicitor and I tried (gently) to explain that details of the agreement cannot be amended after mediation has been gone through. His main point of contension was that he agreed a deadline with stbew for clearing his remaining posessions from the old family home which he now wants to postpone. He became very angry, and when I pointed out that if he extended the deadline I would not be available to help him (as I was under the impression he wanted/needed my help) he turned on me and said "oh well, that will probably let me get the job done quicker!" I was deeply hurt as I have tried to help and to remain calm and supportive. I am not particularly interested in his old posessions and simply thought it would be in everyone's best interests to help him get away from the house as requested by stbew sooner rather than later. Am I being unreasonable and over sensitive? Should I back off and leave him to it?

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ashleyfalero · 23/07/2013 04:37

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RedHelenB · 24/07/2013 21:32

Yes!

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