Permission to take children abroad

[Discomama]

When H and I are divorced will I need his permission to take the kids abroad? We all have the same surname for now. Or is it just a case of being "courteous" and letting him know that we're off?!

[ivykaty44]

my ex has never asked permission to take mine abroad and i have never expected him to they are his dc and I take them abroad for holidays so don't see why he would need to ask any more than I would need to ask.

[Pipparivers]

katy it is not a courtesy thing to request. You can be required to provide proof that you have permission to take the child out of the country by port officials. I don't think it happens very often

[ivykaty44]

So are you saying that a port official can stop someone taking a holiday if they choose because they don't have what paper work?

I am leaving the country next week what paper work should I sort out? I have passports

[TurnipIsTaken]

Get a letter from your ex saying it's fine plus take birth certificates for dcs to prove you are their parent. Apparently shared surname on passports is not enough from my experience at passport control. I managed to talk my way out of it but next time I am taking no chances.

OP, there is some clause that the parent with residency can take the children abroad for I think two weeks without permission from ex. But that is in terms of your ex objecting to the courts, not if you get questioned at passport control.

[ivykaty44]

how do border control know if the parent is dead?

[TurnipIsTaken]

What do you mean - if you tell them that? If you want to be super safe you could get a death certificate of a notarised letter I suppose.

[ivykaty44]

well if the ex has since died then how on earth do you get a letter from them to give permission, not like you can contact them to get a letter is it?

Plus why would you have a death certificate of and ex on you when you are going on holiday and how would boarder control know that the death certificate was of the person who was the father of the child? Not as if they have the same names.

TBH I have travelled probably in the region of 15 time abroad on my own with my dd's and never travelled with a death certificate or a birth certificate and just with passports for all of us and no boarder control official in any country has ever questioned if I am the mother of my daughters or if I have permission to take them into or out of a country.

I have never seen other families travelling with birth certificates or death certificates just passports to prove who they are, if you get a passport for your dc then they take the mother passport number or the fathers passport number or both.

[TurnipIsTaken]

You have obviously been fortunate to never have been questioned then, I've been abroad with ds once and it happened to us. There was a thread a while ago and quite a few parents said they had been questioned, although plenty also said they hadn't. I didn't enjoy them questioning my two year old so I will make sure I'm prepared next time, just in case.

If they are dead I expect you tell the border person that, they are trained to sniff out when people sound or look like they are lying. Like I said if you want to be certain of no problems you apply for a copy of the death cert or a statement signed by a solicitor to take with you.

The child's birth cert will have the names of the parents on it so that's how they will know you are proffering the right death cert and, indeed, that you are actually the dc's parent.

[ivykaty44]

the birth certificate will not have names of both parents if the parents are not married, you are not allowed to put the name of the father on a birth certificate if the father is not present at the register office unless you are married at the time of the birth/or he is present at register office

[Sidge]

My solicitor has told me that as long as you are out of the country for no more than 4 weeks then permission from the ex is not required. (where you were married and both have parental responsibility)

[TurnipIsTaken]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/lone_parents/a1753526-Have-any-of-you-been-stopped-and-questioned-while-travelling-with-child-with-different-surname

[SavoyCabbage]

I take a letter from dh, birth certificates and our wedding certificate.

[ivykaty44]

the thread is mostly parents with different names from their dc I have the same name as my dd's and I would guess this is why I haven't been questioned. Added to which my dd can talk for themselves they are old enough and confident enough to be taken into a room on their own and asked who they are travelling with.

[jenny99]

Is it just people with different surnames to their DC having trouble taking the children out of the country? I am in the process of getting a divorce, however I have taken my DCs abroad quite a lot without my stbx, often when we went ahead, and then he joined us. I have never been questioned at all. Next week he is taking DS1 away - will he be questioned?

[Ziggyzoom]

Unless he specifically objects and makes a complaint of 'child abduction' to the police then there would never be an issue. So a courteous agreement would be a good way to avoid that. If that is not possible, then as Sidge's solicitor states, unless you take them out of the country for more than 28 days, then there is no issue - presuming you have parental responsibility.

[SavoyCabbage]

I've got the same name as my dc and I've been questioned.

[ivykaty44]

and did they stop you from entering the country or going on holiday savoy?

[SavoyCabbage]

Leaving the UK I've been stopped and entering another country too but on another trip.

[Collaborate]

Anyone saying that you can take a child out of the country for up to 28 days without the consent of the other parent with parental responsibility is wrong. That only applies where you have a residence order in force, and then only applies to the person in whose favour the residence order is made.

It's always sensible to have a letter from the other parent just in case you're questioned. To not have the letter means you run the risk of being stopped. It doesn't happen often, but some countries are more likely to ask for proof than others, and it would prevent a holiday if you get it wrong.