History Married 17 years, separated March 12. He now lives 250 miles away.
CONTACT WITH HIM HAS BEEN BY TEXT ONLY.
Mortgage in my name only. 2 children 9 & 14 yrs
Solicitors letter received iut if the blue November 12 wanting me to sign agreement that we had been separated 2yrs & all sorted with finances & children. I refused as not true.
Lots of abusive and threatening text messages received because of this.
Originally arranged to see children every other weekend but novelty wore off and has only seen them 3 times this year.
Dictates by text when he will be picking them up at very short notice and gets very irate if they already have plans. Accuses me if nit letting him see them. I have never stopped him seeing them and would like them to see more of him. I could also use the break as it just me. I have no local support network.
Asked him to a arrange dates in advance but says he Cant as he wirks in retail??m
He stopped paying child support few months ago & refused to make voluntary arrangement to make payments.
Contacted CSA, he has tried to delay but now at the point of getting attachment to earnings.
More abusive & threatening texts. Seemed extremely unstable & threatened to move back in. Scared so changed locks.
He has since messages daughter to say that he will be moving back locally at end of june so will probably end up getting out of paying any child support at all.
1 week after CSA wrote to him about payments he sent through divorce papers from different solicitor this time. Full of innacuracies and lies about my behaviour, finances and children. He also wants me to pay his costs. He earns 4 times more than me.
I work part-time and support family with no help from him both financially and emotionally. Childcare costs are crippling. All reserves have been depleted and will be lucky if next mortgage payment is made.
Can't get legal aid as it no longer exists so also have to fork out for solicitor costs. Can't imagine that they will look after my best interests of I can't afford to pay them so feel backed into a corner.
He wants house sold so he can have a wedge of cash but I want to keep so children have a roof. Daughter going through GCSEs so far too much disruption to move. House probably wouldn't sell for a decent price due to all the dodgy unfinished and dangerous DIY jobs he left behind and I can't afford to rent privately.
I am happy to go to mediation for children & finances but find this idea really daunting as he is a compulsive liar and will say what ever hee feels will get him what he wants. It's so exhausting trying to keep up with it and actually figure out the truth.
I am afraid that he will charm and manipulate mediator into giving him what he wants and would feel intimidated about having a meeting with him there.
Can I use text message evidence during meeting. I just have no idea how this is going to work and just so worried that he will be successful in his vendetta to see me with nothing without any regards to how he is making our children suffer. They have already sacrificed so much and havebeen so amazing that I csnt bear to see them hurt anymore by a so called father who only thinks if himself and his pocket.
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Divorce/separation
Children suffering because of his vendetta.
5 replies
awmoo · 02/06/2013 11:12
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