Grateful for advice on housing situation

[rhoobabble]

Hello, I am trying to plan the great escape from my total twat of a P. If i stay in home with kids i will need to get an occupancy order (but kids get to stay in own home nr school etc), or do i just move out with kids? I cant help thinking the first is better, but will definitely be more hassle. I don't have ownership of the house, but have been told an occupancy order should be no prob, but I know that he will be as bloody minded as possible - maybe a move is better?
I would be really grateful for any advice you could offer, should my kids stay in their home, or have a fresh start? Moving into another home in our village would be very very difficult financially so it may be further away if we leave.
Thanks xx

[KatherineKavanagh]

Do you have enough money saved?

[Movingout]

I have just left my abusive husband, I stayed for much longer than I should have done because I knew I couldn't afford anywhere on my own; but I was wrong! Even though I work full time, because my salary in relatively low I am entitled to housing benefit (whilst house is being sold). I have both children with me and as he is giving us no money things are tight, but no more shouting and abusive remarks. Check with your local council and then consider renting privately. There's a lot on MN about private landlords not accepting housing benefit, but as far as I can see there is absolutely no reason to tell as money is paid into your account. Good luck!

[ivykaty44]

It is going to be difficult either way.

Do you make the children happy by letting them stay in their own home? or do you make it harder - mum and dad split, plus a new home, plus a new school.

or do you make him leave and get a new home

On balance it would be one person and one new home rather than three big changes for the children?

It might be more painful for you in the short term but in the long term a lot better for you.

[Scarredbutnotbroken]

You news to find our what your entitlements are - I do well with tax credits etc. well enough to manage etc. you should go and get the 30 mind free legal advise re the occupancy order though. I got one easily but it's attached to a non molestation order. Depends what your grounds are too?

[rhoobabble]

I have no money saved and terrible debts. I was a headteacher but lost my job due to mental health problems( probably caused by him). He is definately emotionally abusive, Since I read the riot act I am no longer a cunt or bitch, but I just cant stand the low level monotonous comments or in fact the pathetic sorry puppy dog act. I literally last outburst held up my hands and said "Fine" .I feel like just giving in. I go to bed later and later because I cant relax in there with him.