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Divorce/separation

Is the shit about to hit the fan?

6 replies

bumbums · 18/06/2012 17:50

STBEX moved out on the 11th April and has been staying at a mates.
He's just signed up to rent a house. I'm seeing solictor on Friday to anniciate divorce procedings.

We have been fairly amicable so far. There has been the odd row, but these were based on both of our fears of the unknown.
I think he earns enough that, with the benifits I'll get, we should both come out of this with a reasonable standard of life.

Does anyone have an actual ammicable divorce? Or does it always turn bitter and nasty?

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bumbums · 18/06/2012 19:29

Its all feeling a little bit too real now that he's found a place to rent.

Two out of the four other couples i know at the moment who are also mid divorce are having the most horrendous experience.

Anyone sat down for the eveing who can relate?

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Collaborate · 19/06/2012 09:27

If you could fund it (legal aid isn't available for it) you could try a collaborative divorce. They are, for want of a better word, "happy" divorces. Look at the collaborative section of the www.resolution.org website, under the "alternatives to court" tab.

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bumbums · 22/06/2012 14:11

Just had appointment with solicitor. She said that as I am eligable for legal aid I'd be better of going down the mediation route as it will most likely cost me nothing. I'm not expecting any cash settlement at the end of it all.

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Thetallestsunflower · 13/07/2012 13:22

Same here! My abusive husband has agreed to move out while he gets counselling to help him resolve his issues and suddenly turns into Mr Perfect. I just can't see this happening and feel the only way forward is divorce. Totally terrified though as so far he is only co opperating because he thinks we will get back together.
I am going to try and get some legal advice regarding the best way of dealing with this.

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Shybairns · 13/07/2012 19:01

sunflower I've name changed now as realised my old name used to be a pet name stbexh had for me.
Get him moved out first would be my advice. Don't do anything to get his back up till then.
Good luck.

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Lovemy3kids · 13/07/2012 22:19

My stbxh and I were amicable.....until hinooks gf chucked him as he was cheating on her (I told her that part...long story) and he now has a new gf who he thinks more of than his kids and now he hardly sees them, does everything she wants him to do, and has even stopped paying maintenance for his 3 kids. I just let them get on with it, because I know what shes coming to her somewhere along the line!! We are divorcing, and have already sold our house and split the asserts, but we now have to go to mediation (which I'm not looking forward too) with regards to childcare. I thought we'd be able to stay amicable and remain friends for the kids sake.....but he's shown his tru colours and is definitely not the man I married ! Good luck xx

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