How do I deal with this? Mental health...

[Emba]

Hi my husband has just told me he is leaving. No 3rd parties, just not in love with me anymore. He is set on leaving but can't right away so we are trying to be amicable. So far I've known for about 48 hrs. I'm in so much shock right now and so scared. What makes it worse is we have 3 childrenthionyl the eldest 2 are a previous relationship. I remarried and we have a son together too. I am so terrified of how I am going to cope. My first husband committed suicide leaving me with 2 children, how are they gonna cope with this on top? I now have 2 children from a father who killed himself and one from a failed marriage...how will I cope? I'm worried cos I've been low and tho I wouldn't consider taking my own life, I am scared I can't handle this mentally. I don't know where to start as we rent and it's too expensive to stay here on benefits....I may need to change the kids school...how do I deal eith this and stay string enough for my kids??? Please help, sorry for the rant!!!

[mynameisdifferent]

Hi Emba Sorry to hear of the difficult situation that you are in. I think your husband is being really selfish if this has just come out of the blue, is he not prepared to try and make things work or do you think things have run their course also? You will need to make some plans together on how things will work out with the children and living accommodation for them - I am not sure how the benefit system works sorry so don't know if you would be eligible for full housing support to enable you to stay where you are for the childrens sake or what maintenance you would get but I am sure there are some helpful places out there such as CAB, gingerbread (for single parents) etc that would be able to work out, or point you in the direction of someone who can help work out, what financial assistance you would be able to get.

Try not to worry about all the problems in one go, you may find that you don't end up needing to change school and for now you just need to get through each day.

BTW I think you are doing marvellous as you sound as though you are holding it together really well considering you have just been dealt quite a big life changing event!

I am sure there are others on here who would have a better idea of the sort of organisations who could help you with the practical side of things such as sorting finances etc but just wanted to send you hugs and my little bit of advice :)
xxx

[EllenandBump]

if you are on a low income (even if working) you are still entitled to some housing benefit, council ta benefit to help towards the rent. If you are solely on benefits housing benefit does pay the rent for you but there is a limit as to what they will pay up to, but if you would experience exceptional hardship there are various discretionary payments available from local councils. I know its hard sweetie, just try to look on the positives, (hard i know) but you have 3 gorgeous children who love you to bits. You are doing amazingly well. x