Mumsnet Discussions - Single Mum, Disabled, Depression and Lonely. (Long Sorry)

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Single Mum, Disabled, Depression and Lonely. (Long Sorry)

(12 Posts)

By Fri 23-Jan-09 12:38:43 Add message | Report | Contact poster

(BTW - Sorry I'm not good with my literacy skills)

Hello. I'm a single mum of one. I'm in my late twenties, lately I've been feeling lonely and I think I might have depression.

My ex left me, when I was 6 months pregnant. My son, who's nearly 4. He's the only reason, I get up in the mornings, keep me going. Recently my depression seems to be getting worse, some nights I cry and I hate being lonely. Lost my confidance and I don't feel like socialising at all. I'm a very shy woman and I find it hard to make friends.

None of the mothers at my son's nursery, really talk to me or make affort to come and make an conversation with me. To be honest, they are quite snobbish and I live in a small villege.

I look at my life, empty in comparison. Yeah I have my beautiful, wonderful son but its not enough. I need more. I need a friend who will be there to help me get over my latest crisis, I need a friend to celebrate with when things work out, I need someone to talk to about parenting issues and everything that comes up. Someone to hang out with on a friday night when everyone else is partying, someone to go to the movies with.

But, what I want most of all, what I long for with all my heart and soul, is someone who understands me, someone who loves me for who I am. Someone to sit up all night talking to, to laugh and cry with. Someone who knows me better than anyone else is the world, where we need no words to express how we feel. Someone who will hold me close after a hard day, wrap their arms around me and block out the world. Someone who will comfort me and also motivate me, encourage me and inspire me and I want to be the person who does all those things for someone too.

Deep down, I haven?t got a friend to turn to.

Natty

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sun 25-Oct-09 19:08:45

Dear all
We run a lovely parent and toddler drop in every Thursday afternoon specifically for adults with disabilities and their children (under 5s)called Sunshine Corner.
It is located in 42 Westbourne Park Road W2 at Westminster Centre for Independent Living very near Royal Oak tube and parking available. If you would like someone to talk to you or accompany you the first time you come along, please ask us. It's free and open from 4-5.30pm. There is an enclosed garden for the children to run around in and ride bikes etc and we always try to put on arty/crafty things each week and storytime plus singing if people want it.
Do give it a try.
Bayswater Children's Centre on 020 7266 8747

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 23-Oct-09 14:43:37

Hiya Natty

I had an accident 18yrs ago which left me disabled, i'm a mum of 2 and like you have felt very isolated.

I think once you open up about your feelings to your family and doctor it will make you feel so much better.

Give it time with the nursery mums!

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Tue 09-Jun-09 13:14:50

Hi Natty, I'm effectively a single dad (my wife has a severe brain injury) with a 4 year old girl and 2 year old boy (who I've raised since he was 10 days old), and just wanted to say that your message has helped my depression considerably. Just to know that I'm not the only person out there feeling lonely and that other people have challenges has made me feel far less isolated. If you too realise that there are so many more people out there in very similiar circumstances, then I hope you too may feel less lonely.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Tue 26-May-09 15:14:16

Natty- how's things?

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 21-May-09 18:47:21

Sorry can't offer any help or advice but I'm thinking of you and hope you get something sorted soon.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 21-May-09 18:41:55

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you, Natty05

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 14-May-09 09:05:25

just wanted to add to your list of friends.

if you pluck up the courage to see your doctor...don't worry how you are going to tell him how you feel...just print of your first post...THAT says it all.

If you cannot face that, how about phoning your health visitor..mine sometimes came here- just to chat...and even accompanied me to a doctors appointment to make sure i 'told how i really felt' as i kept making doctors appointments...and not going. knowing she was trying to help made me go to the appontment.

Depression is a cruel thing...we can wear masks that means noone notices how awful we feel...

my boys are older than yours...but i can still remember the lonlieness of being 'the mum that noone bothers with'.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 23-Jan-09 18:53:41

I'm a single mum to Ds who's 5.
I have M.E. and nderstand how isolating it all is.

Feel free to email me -

me and thomas AT hotmailDOTcom ( taking out the spaces and the at and dot are normal )

Hang in there.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 23-Jan-09 13:14:20

No problems

Just when I read it couldv'e been me who wrote it.

Only difference is I pretended to yself for long eneough that I was fine, I knew I wasn't but I thouht if I put the 'happy mask' on all the time maybe I would be happy and stop feeling so shitty but sadly It doesn't work like that

Well I know I may be a random stranger but maybe thats a good thing right enough sometimes it helps to open up to someone who wont judge because they know X about you IYKWIM.

My email addy is sr86 @ hotmail . co . uk

If youwant mail me and we could maybe share between us LOL who knows mught even cheer each other up

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 23-Jan-09 13:07:57

Thank you for replying.

I've been thinking of making appointment to see my GP, but I'm stuggling to hold it together lately. I cannot bring myself to talk to my GP about my problems at the moment.

But I do think it would help me, because of with my self esteem, shyness and depression etc. I have got family, who live in the same villege, but I cannot 'open up' to them. Feel slightly embarrassed, I always put on a 'Happy face'. If you get me?

I honestly have tried to talk to the mums at the nursery, but I can sense that they don't want to get to know me as a person.

Sorry It's short message, I've got to leave and pick up my son from Nursery.

Thanks

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Single Mum, Disabled, Depression and Lonely. (Long Sorry)