does a woman deserve a bit of slack if she has her period IYO?

[hermykne]

just like a few voices on this matter
or should i be happy jolly smiley all the time

[DontlookatmeImshy]

Depends on the circumstances.

Quite frankly when I'm just starting and having horrendous cramps there's noway I'm going to behappy jolly smiliy.

Has something specific happened?

[beckybrastraps]

Just asked dh and he says it's a matter of basic self-interest. If he cuts me some slack, he gets a much easier time of it.

[hermykne]

my dh just loves to use it as ammo against me and i havent done anything wrong, just bit more tired than normal and not "happy", plus 2 children to mind under 4.

would your husband leave you alone even if you snapped?

[beckybrastraps]

He is generally pretty lovely if I snap actually. He is upstairs with two wailing children right now, and I'm MNetting with a large glass of white port. And I don't have PMT!

[hermykne]

lucky you - dh and port!

[pointydog]

In my opinion, no.

[beckybrastraps]

Really? I think anyone deserves a bit of slack if they're finding things tough-going. I do it for dh when he has had a frustrating day dealing with incompetents (his pet moan). He returns the favour. Seems fair enough to me.

[pointydog]

every month though.

I think PMT's over-done.

[hermykne]

pointydog
i dont complain , dont even draw attention to it. but today he just blamed me being in a mood (dont know where that came from as i am not- just really tired) on it and basically told me to p&&& off.
i'd take dd swimming to her one on one class iwas wrecked after it - i had to get in pool and do the stuff the teacher told me to do.
i came home, he opened the door she fell and i said oh pick her up. he didnt and wouldnt when i said it again. i had our 2 bags in my hands, it was drizzling. and she was tired too , it was 5pm after all.

then he proceded to tell me i was rude to his mate on the phone,
can i just moan and tell what happended

phone rang - kids screaming shouting in fun, i said hello, he said is M there? i said yes who's calling , (now this guy knows me, has eaten here and couldnt say Hi H. how are u and is M there). I put the phone on mute as kds shouting and called M to phone, now how was that rude on my behalf.

[PippiLangstrump]

I do snap quite badly too actually - I became something like a Dr Jeckill and Mr Hide type.
DH is lovely, never ever snaps back, probably for pure self interest. still... I think he is a saint (I won't agree on this if you ask me then though )!

[hermykne]

god you have nice sympathetic husbands, who just get on with things.

[pointydog]

I think your husband should generally be nicer to you all the time, hermykne. I don't think whether you've got your period or not should come into this.

[hermykne]

yes pointy youre right.
thats kinda what i was tryint to say but i am tired - in my jammies now and off to bed as soon as my 2 monkeys are in theirs.

[nightowl]

would depend on whether you're a woman using pmt as an excuse to lash out or whether you genuinely feel awful.

personally, the week before mine i feel so tearful i'll cry at a nappy advert and so angry i could happily bash someone. i dont get cramps anymore so cant blame it on that but i do feel awful mentally.

i am not btw, any kind of princess tippy toes normally.. even when pg i am the kind of person to just get on with it (as far as my back will physically allow). hormones are strange things.

[pointydog]

I hope you ahve good dreams.

[UnquietDad]

I agree with becky. Give-and-take when you know the other person has had a crap day for whatever reason.

[VeniVidiVickiQV]

Absolutely. Women cant help being women.

When you are doubled up and physically cant move due to stomach cramps, or your hormones do funky things to your brain, I think it requires a bit of sympathy and understanding.

I'd take care of DP (if he let me) if he was - and often is - feeling a bit rubbish.

[Fubsy]

There was a woman on Jeremy Vine the other week who said we men should give their seats up for women because we have periods, and have to wear suits and high heels to work.

WTF?

[pointydog]

and because we have very heavy handbags full of lipsticks

[Crazydazy]

If I am a bit off or make a sarky remark DP will say "is it that time of the month?" which is even more infuriating

9 times out of 10 though it is that time of the month which riles me even more

[Tatat]

I think of it like this, there are things I really struggle to keep contained throughout most of the month (eg ffs lift a single finger, no I do not know where your fing pant are I do not keep an inventory of your underwear)
However for 4 days or so every four weeks I cannot keep them in any longer. They pop out (he ="ooh are you due on you're such a silly bitch today"). He should thank pmt really at least then I have a specific time to let it all out, if it wasn't for PMT I wouldn't bother keeping it all in he'd get that EVERY DAY

[wishing1]

I get bad pms and dh is not supportive at all, he does the same thing, if I'm upset he says "is it that time of the month again" he says women use it as an excuse to be bitchy. Yes, we all love bleeding and cramping and headaches and feeling like crap I'm sure you are all with me, don't you just look forward to your period each month?? It totally sucks! How would they feel living 7 days with a headache and cramps and such, they wouldn't survive. All men would have hysterectomies!!

[wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe]

hmmm. but how many women are understanding of their husbands if they're ever moody? A lot of women expect their husbands to not take their moods out on them, and rightly so, but is it then fair that it's ok for women to be snappy etc just because they're on their period?

I do find the phrase "is it that time of the month" extremely patronising, but I don't necessarily think that women should be able to use pmt as an excuse to be able to be snappy at their husbands.

It should be a two-way thing IMO, we should all be considerate of each other all of the time.