A man's view needed regarding dumping friends

(10 Posts)
Sarajen Mon 22-Jul-13 14:15:47

I've started a thread on this elsewhere.

I'm a female and my dh and myself go to a pub where we often chat at length to another guy.

A few days ago, we so this guy and he was a bit cool to us. When my dh went to the loo, he started telling me that my dh had done his head in and basically would not be talking to us.

Please bear in mind that this is a guy we know from the pub only. He is not our best friend forever, just a pleasant chap we socialise with about once a week.

I'm really pissed off with this guy; why not tell my dh directly if he had a problem with him?

Why mention anything at all? Why not just be polite and say that he was off to talk to so-and-so or simply go to another pub for a little while?

Basically this guy has effectively made a bit of a drama out of dumping a few acquaintances who got on OK with him.

Who does that? Who knows, tomorrow he might feel like spending time with us, so why say anything at all?

Jeez, are MOST men like this? What would the guys here done in his position?

Panonabike Mon 22-Jul-13 14:36:50

as I'm sure you've been asked elsewhere, isn't it you making a drama out of nothing? He's not your friend, he doesn't owe you anything. Just let it gooooo....

Wishfulmakeupping Mon 22-Jul-13 14:45:15

Don't go to a different pub just go there say hi to him but you and your dh sit elsewhere.
If you're dh wouldn't take it too much to heart or overreact I would tell him what the bloke says. Sounds like the blokes a bit weird anyway so I wouldn't worry too much

Wishfulmakeupping Mon 22-Jul-13 14:45:48

Just realised you wanted a man's view which I am not smile

Sarajen Mon 22-Jul-13 15:03:21

Panonabike, well that's it exactly, isn't it? He's not really a close friend so why did he feel the need to bend my earhole about why he wasn't going to talk to us anymore? I sat there quite shocked to be honest. I've never experienced the like. If I'm not keen on an acquaintance in a social setting, I just politely ignore them. I don't give them the 3rd degree as to why I'm ignoring them.

If somebody is just an acquaintance, why go to all that trouble? Why be so rude?

Doesn't his behaviour strike you as arrogance.

The irony is that had he just said 'I'm going to talk to so-and-so. See you later' I'd have thought nothing of it.

Who makes a point of dumping a casual acquaintance? Just avoid them for goodness sake. Grr. grin

Thing is, I'm going to feel really awkward around him now, when had he not said anything, I wouldn't. Now it'll be as if I'm intruding on his personal space just being around him.

runningonwillpower Mon 22-Jul-13 15:07:33

He doesn't sound right in the head to me.

I wouldn't care what he thinks but I sure would be giving him a wide berth for my own sake.

Sarajen Mon 22-Jul-13 15:18:24

To ask any male posters here again, do guys usually bother explaining to casual acquaintances they're not keen on in the pub/club/social setting exactly why they won't be talking to them at length or do you just politely ignore/pass small talk?

I know from experiences that women do bother explaining.

Panonabike Mon 22-Jul-13 15:32:38

No, ime me and other chaps are unlikely to bother - we'd just politely disengage and avoid said casual acquaintance.

and we def wouldn't consult the internet about it either.grin

Sarajen Mon 22-Jul-13 15:46:51

Panonabike Lol. I am female so I can be excused wink. Yeah, I'm guessing that most guys are not as rude as this one.

SilkySilky Thu 25-Jul-13 20:34:57

Sounds like the other guy has the problem, not you.
Sit and talk elsewhere.
Problem solved.

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