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Ahem. Men's performance & age?

17 replies

Snowrose1311 · 14/06/2013 17:10

OK, can't believe I am posting this. But I really have no-one to ask in RL...

I am separated, mid-30s lady and a nice man is paying lots of attention to me, we're 'friends' but I think he'd like to start a LTR with me (he's been hinting). I like him too but he's late 40s. Erm, my ExH really didn't pay much attention to me, IYKWIM, and I'd like to have a proper love life within a LTR while I'm still 'young'. This guy who is interested in me is so nice but at his age would it be unreasonable to expect much between the sheets? I mean in terms of desire and also ability. He is fit & healthy, doesn't smoke/drink, no health conditions.

Can any men out there kindly let me know what the deal is with gents aged late 40s plus? It's not that I need a good seeing to every night of the week, but I don't want to start something with a guy who can only offer kisses & cuddles...

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PapaGander · 14/06/2013 18:12

Vintage car ownership has the potential to make you feel special every trip, gives you a veneer of class and offers a charismatic drive.

Expensive faults on the particular example your considering will become apparent on the test drive.

Book the test drive.

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NotDead · 14/06/2013 18:31

well can only speak from experience but if anything sex drive has gone up.. but stimulation needed is harder deeper and more cerebral.. talking dirty and being really into it will help. In short being female and naked was almost enough when I was 18 .. (mind you even then.. ) but at 40 you need women to do more than just be naked..though try telling some of them that and they go mental and start sliding around the walls with a blanket on. .its just not sexy!

you might find things like erection getting softer and harder during sex.. which I can't remember if happened when I was younger.. but noticed it last time.. but agai that was with someone whose.. er boundaries were quite narrow .so tbh could have been going in and out of the mental stuff...when I was younger if I wasn't into the shafting.. theb it woukd be fingers or tongues or rubbing on etc or licking other parts of body or moving rooms... that hasn't changed.

Actually I am more likely to pretend age is the issue when its really.. Im not into it

Ive also noticed that the drunk needed to jump on each other is now sometimes past the drunk needed to have a big pervy erection. but hey.. I am more aware now that women need to fin say how they like to be pkayed with and I tell them to tell me pull my head away point. ryb where I should be licking and tell me what storiez they want to hear etc etc so on balance seems to work out well. Basically dont worry or 'observe' the sex to see.. just enjoy and be vocal and imagimative it will be fine..

oh yeah remember the maxim..if its not good..practice more.. and if its great ..do it again!

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NotDead · 14/06/2013 18:35

oh but I am v early 40s so hope other answers arent dismal :)

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NotDead · 14/06/2013 18:48

Also you aren't teen so it doesn't need to be ecxlusive as soon as you hold hands or your mates will tell.. get yourself some dates with a hot young lover too if you like until you get serious.. life's too short!

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widowerbutok · 15/06/2013 12:50

I am 68, had a prostrate operation (not cancer) and cancer. I still enjoy sex but making love even more. Not a 3 times a night man now...lol but have found experience and consideration for her needs and desires give much more pleasure. Viagra helps now and then (chemo was a sod) but 40!! geeesss still a child...lol. Agree with some of the comments but still find the truth in the fact that a responsive horny partner is the best aphrodisiac in the world.

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Snowrose1311 · 16/06/2013 19:21

OK, some helpful responses... widowerbutok I'm sorry to hear you had cancer, hope you're all clear now? Would anyone else care to share? ...

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widowerbutok · 16/06/2013 20:51

Thanks Snowrose1311 I am clear at the moment.

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Kiwiinkits · 04/07/2013 03:35

DH mid forties and has no problem whatsoever with 3-4 times per week. I suspect he would have it off in every different way every night if I was into it!

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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 10/07/2013 08:27

He might have first night nerves, but then I did at 29 with DW. Matters resolved themselves, and there was much warmth and astonishment.

24 years later, I need Viagra to keep it up: this can mean it won't go down until the second half. One couple on here tried it for the first time and had 4 goes and a visit to Centre Parcs!

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SeparatedDad · 19/07/2013 15:12

Definitely agree with PapaGander. Take the test drive. Every model is different. I'm 45 and as long as I keep to my daily exercise and don't overeat, my GF (also early 30s) and I have lots of fun between the sheets.

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Oldandcobwebby · 19/07/2013 16:20

50 here. No problems!

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CityTiliDie · 28/07/2013 18:29

49 here. Never been hornier!

Much to my DWs annoyance.

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yabyum · 28/07/2013 18:32

Bloody hell OP.

Late forties is hardly ancient you know. Just jump him!

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Nexus6 · 02/08/2013 17:01

ha! this is funny, well I'm 23 and my husband (married 2 years, together for 5) is 42 this september and we have a beautiful 3 week old DD.

Basically, age isnt really anything to go by....

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nk65alot · 02/09/2013 00:33

A bit late to this but a subject dear to me.

How did it go BTW?

It is hard to generalise but based on my experience, as I have gotten older I believe I have become a much better lover; giving more attention, more considerate, skilled and in control of myself hence lovemaking lasts longer and is much more satisfying for us both. Only minus is the recovery time afterwards is perhaps a bit longer!

For you probably more important than just age is the health, working hours and level of stress the guy is under; when I changed to a less stressful job in my mid 40's and had more time to keep in shape, sex improved considerably. In some respects around 50 was a "peak".

Note some girls seem to prefer slightly older guys for other reasons - they can be more attentive, stable and if successful offer greater financial security.

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biggerbazzer · 28/10/2013 10:44

age is no barrier ,perhaps in looks it is, i'm 61 and love sex it gets better as you get older, mind I do prefer someone my own age but that's never stopped me going for younger ones who I've managed to satisfy and gone again after .....an older guy as lots more techniques and non of this wham bam thank you mam.

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normalishdude · 25/11/2013 13:27

I am nearly 45. My sex life had a few peaks-- 17-25 and then again 30-34, then again 40-current. It's not quite as strong now as it was when younger but it's not far off. My absolute peak was at 40 (and maybe my 31st birthday!) I think it's related to fitness more than anything. If he's in shape, I say go for it!

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