What if my writing's sh*t and I'm deluding myself?

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

It could be though couldn't it. I know I've only been waiting a few days for a response from an agent but what if it's dire. Where do I go from here?

[Beauregard]

What have you written Belle?

I have 'written' a children's story which i think is good but not sure whether it's drivel.I am crap at grammar etc but i enjoyed writing it.

[strandedatsea]

Well at least you've sent it to an agent - good for you! I am trying to finish a novel but keep telling myself why bother when I know it's crap and no-one will be interested.

Have you had any informal feedback?

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

I've had nothing back.

I wrote some childrens books. The most recent is called 'A pigs tale' and is about a little pig who's bullied by his sisters so he tries to make himself bigger so he can be the same. When this doesn't work he tries to make himself faster. Then someone talks some sense into him. They may just be crap and I'm deluding myself.

[winnybella]

Belle, even if you'll end up not getting a publishing deal it won't be because your writing is crap. I read your bee story and it was very well written.

[BitterAndTwistedGoreDodger]

Belle, I have no experience in the field so this is just my opinion.

My understanding is that publishers are looking for particular writing at particular times.

The same way as if a model goes to a casting and doesn't get the job because she looks too 'wholesome' for a grungy job. That doesn't mean she is ugly.

So if you have not heard back, that doesn't mean your writing is crap, it means that you are writing about bees when they are looking for dinosaurs.

J.K.Rowling was in many a slush pile until her material caught the zeitgeist, and I hear she has done ok.

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

I've written another one since the bee one. It' about an egg that some animals find on a farm. It's massive and they try to hatch it so they can return it to it's parent. They have a few problems with it though.

How are people to know what they are looking for if they don't say? I really feel for J.K. Rowling, it's shit.

[Quattrocento]

Well your writing could be perfectly dreadful. I really don't know. But a reassuring thought might be that lots of perfectly dreadful writers have huge commercial success. I give you that misbegotten Mormon who wrote the Twilight series. Or Jeffrey Archer. Neither could write worth a damn. Both hugely successful.

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

lol! I'd like to find out who their agents are, if they let anyone in then I'll stand a chance.

[BitterAndTwistedGoreDodger]

That I don't know the answer to, sorry. My point was that a refusal doesn't mean you are crap at writing, it's just not your time.

What's meant for you won't pass you by Belle.

[winnybella]

Well, she's doing ok now, what with being on the UK richest women list etc

Chin up, it seems like you've been having a bit of tough time recently.

Why don't you post another story? I and I'm sure others would love to read it (although I might have to go to bed in a mo, so probably wouldn't read it til tomorrow)

[strandedatsea]

quattro - that's what I keep telling myself! In this day and age it's as much about the marketing as the writing.....

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

I've just been bullied off my course by the leader so I'm a tad sensitive at the moment. I've had 2 years of her moaning at me, 'you're not academically strong', 'you can't have any more time off sick or I'll have you thrown off the course'' you're a nightmare'. She's a bitch. I want to stick her in a book somewhere so I can send her the fucking thing.

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

I'll get them to delete this tomorrow.

The Great Egg Mystery

It was a warm, sunny morning on Bliss farm as Cherry Chicken woke up in her coop to the sound of the birds tweeting more loudly then usual and the hens cackling away. ?They need me to be in charge again today!? she muttered to herself.
'What?s all of this noise?' Cherry yelled as she went to see what the excitement was.
'We?ve found an egg Cherry. Is it one of yours?' Henry the horse asked.
'No. Certainly not!', said Cherry. 'All of mine are inside my coop. Let me have a look at it.' Cherry stepped closer to the egg. 'Hmm' she clucked, she had certainly not seen an egg like this before. It didn?t look like any of the eggs she had seen in the farmyard or anywhere else for that matter. She was certain that none of the birds that lived there would have laid it. It was far too big and was covered in mud that had dried in the warm sun to make a hard, dirty shell around the egg. She gave the egg a nudge with her beak and it rolled half way across the farmyard. The eggs that she had laid wouldn?t do this.
'I don?t know. Maybe it was one of the big birds and it?s fallen from a nest somewhere. We should look after it, lets take turns to sit on it and wait for it to hatch, it?s mother will be so happy when she gets it back'
All of the other animals nodded in agreement.
'Henrietta, you should sit first.?
?Why me?? Henrietta clucked.
?Because you are not hatching any eggs at the moment dear!?
Henrietta stopped and thought for a moment. It was easier to agree with Cherry, and do as she asked. Cherry would just grumble until the animals gave in and she did have a bit of a headache. ?Oh. Ok then? she replied sighing.
?Everyone, gather some straw and some food for Henrietta, come on. Quickly! The egg is rather large and won?t take long to hatch.? And with that the farm animals searched the farm for fresh straw and oats, then they took them to Henrietta?s coop. She then made a nest, placed the giant egg in the centre and perched herself on the top.
Henrietta didn?t feel very comfortable sitting on top of the egg. She kept sliding off the top and landing on her bottom with a bump! As the days and nights passed nothing happened. After a week Henrietta became very tired.
?I?m sorry. Can someone else take over, I?m tired now. It?s not hatched? she yawned.
?I can take over? shouted Henry the horse.
?Henry. Do you not think that you are too heavy to sit on an egg? You?ll squash it with your large bottom!? replied Cherry sternly.
He paused for a moment. ?I can lay down in the straw and cuddle it? he replied. The other farm animals laughed. Poor Henry.
?Doris duck, where are you my love? It?s your turn. You are not hatching either so you have plenty of time??
?Oh, OK then Cherry? Doris quacked. Doris gathered some straw and soft feathers and set to work making a nest on the riverbank. When the nest was complete, Cherry gently nudged the egg into the centre and Doris sat on the top. After a week nothing happened. There was no hatching, not even a sound was coming from the egg. Doris was feeling very hungry by now so she quacked as loudly as she could to get Cherry?s attention.
?Yes Doris? Cherry replied.
?I?m sorry, I?m very hungry now. I need to get off and go to eat.? Cherry sighed.
?Are none of you able to hatch this egg? Right, who?s turn is it now?? she clucked. After seeing the other birds sitting on the egg for so long the other birds in the farmyard began to back away and hide.
?I will sit on it? neighed Henry, again.
?Henry, you are TOO HEAVY!? she shouted. ?I shall sit on it myself.? She then walked around the farmyard and collected the straw and feathers that she would need to make a nest and carefully made a giant doughnut shape in her coop, ready for the egg. After she had placed the egg in the centre, she sat herself on top and waited for it to hatch. Hours passed. Then days, finally a week and still the egg didn?t hatch. Cherry began to feel very tired but even then she didn?t give in. She began to feel hungry but she did not move from the top of the egg. She was very bored watching all of the animals play but she said she would hatch the egg and hatch the egg she would. After two weeks poor Cherry fell asleep on the top of the egg and slid off the top. She landed on the soft straw around the egg and began to snore, attracting the attention of the other members of the farm.
?She?s fallen asleep!? quacked Doris with a little laugh. ?Now what shall we do. Does anyone want the job?? She looked around and the farmyard was empty except for Henry. Henry took a step forwards towards the egg.
?I will?
?Oh, OK then Henry. I hope you do a good job? she replied, passing the egg to Henry. Henry was very excited, he didn?t wait to build a nest, he placed his bottom on top of the egg and rather quickly sat down.
?CRACK.? The whole farmyard came running out of their hiding places to see the sight of Henry perched on top of a now cracked egg. Poor Henry was very upset.
?I should have listened? he sobbed.
?No, Henry. Look? replied Henrietta. It has something inside, can you see? It?s all white. What on earth is it?.?
Henry looked at the cracked egg and he laughed very loudly. He then raised one of his hooves and brought it down onto the egg, knocking all off all of the mud to reveal a white ball inside. ?You know what it is don?t you?? he said as he began to kick the ball around the farmyard. Who wants a game?
The animals spent all afternoon playing football and the birds won, 3 goals to 1. Cherry slept for three days, it was the best three days that the animals every had. When she woke the other animals told her what had hatched out of the egg, making her wish that she had let Henry sit on it in the first place because it would have saved so much time.

[Pan]

it's tough putting your stuff up for judgement.

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

It would have been far worse to stay on the course with the evil witch.

I don't mind it being slated, I do mind having to wait though. If it's crap then I'd rather they put me out of my misery so I can change it to make it better rather then stew.

How are you Pan?

[Pan]

Am fine belle. What has uberfurher said about the above?

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

Nothing.

[BitterAndTwistedGoreDodger]

Belle, I really like it, but it is a little old fashioned.

This isn't a criticism, btw, DS is currently going through 'the faraway tree' at a rate of knots and loving it.

But perhaps publishers are more about 'edgy' than 'traditional'?

Like I said, I'm not an expert, this is just my opinion.

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

Have you looked that word up in the urban dictionary?

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

So how do you make something edgy?

[Pan]

Well, as a criticism. I am struggling with what it's 'about', the 'message', apart from very general things. You need to be more specific and focussed? IMVHO. But it is difficult to do this sort of thing.

[winnybella]

I think that the sentences are a bit too long. Could you try breaking them up a bit?

I really got into the story but the ending was a bit of an anti-climax- I think it would work better if you made Cherry even more bossy, so that we feel a bit of glee when she finds out how mistaken she was iyswim.

There are a few repetitions ('other birds' twice in the same sentence), one rogue apostrophe ('its mother' not 'it's').

You write very well, the idea is good, it pulls the reader in.

I would just try to think about how interesting it would be for a child- I think it's more 4-5 yo than 7yo (I think that's what you said on your bee thread) in terms of a subject matter but perhaps a bit too difficult for that age group (even though I enjoyed it, loved the details etc)

I'm also falling asleep here so I might not be making much sense.

But your writing is not shit (well, to me it isn't, I'm just an Eng Lit student)

[belledechocolatefluffybunny]

The ones I wrote after this are better, I'm not posting them on here though i'll have a look at that tomorrow Pan, thank you

[sharbie]

yh i don't know much about this but aren't childrens' books supposed to have some sort of message or learning attached??

[BitterAndTwistedGoreDodger]

Christ knows, I'm not a writer. I agree with pan that the message isn't clear, but if I knew the secret of 'edgy' writing I wouldn't be working at a supermarket, that's for sure.