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Conception

How soon after a MC did you feel ready to try again?

19 replies

nauseous · 20/03/2008 17:03

Had a MMC last week, ERPC this Monday. Was 8/10 on a scale of blo*dy awful. I'm just curious as to when the 'we have to try again' mummy hormones and feelings kicked in again for you? If you don't mind me asking.

Personally I feel like i need to feel pregnant again like I I need a hole in the head but knowing me this will change pretty soon. I usually have everything I do planned out and so I'm not quite sure what I feel now. I'd be interested to know how everyone else feels about it.

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ClairePO · 20/03/2008 17:08

Hey nauseous, sorry about your mc

We tried again straight away. I had about 4/5 days post scan (which was while we were away in Germany) before I had all the medical stuff done at home in UK. For the first few days I didn't think I wanted to try again for maybe another year. After a few days I had totally changed my mind and like I say, we started trying again as soon as the bleeding had stopped.

Good luck whatever you decide on.

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Unfitmother · 20/03/2008 17:09

Sorry to hear your news. I wanted to try again straight away, were advised to wait until after next period.

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Lcy · 20/03/2008 17:22

Sorry to hear about your mmc. I felt a strong need to get pregnant again after my mmc. We tried again as soon as bleeding from ERPC stopped. Despite the need, trying again was so frightening because i was so scared about losing another baby. However i did get pregnant again and so far it is all ok!

I am also a planner so found the whole mmc, ttc thing very stressful because i was totally out of control.

Look after yourself x

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nauseous · 20/03/2008 18:06

Thank you ladies. Its good to see how everyone else handles this emotional rollercoaster. Like you ClairePO I initally felt like enjoying my freedom for a while, drinking lots of cocktails and generally forgetting all about it, and putting off the stress of ttc, but to be honest i just can't see me keeping this up. I know I'll give in. I have ZERO willpower and I know my DH will be keen to get trying again. We'll see!

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keevamum · 20/03/2008 18:15

Sorry to hear about your pain nauseous. I tried straight away last time and then miscarried again. The drs advised waiting 3 months before trying again. I waited a month and then succesfully had DD2. However, emotionally I think I should have left it a while longer...Put your feelings first.

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iliketosleep · 20/03/2008 23:28

we started trying straight after the bleeding stopped. I had a mmc but lost naturally. I lost on sept 11th and got my bfp on nov 30th and am now 19 weeks gone

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EachPeachPearMum · 20/03/2008 23:35

Had mc 2 weeks ago, and def not ready to step on the emotional rollercoaster again yet.

It's just too raw

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Springflower · 21/03/2008 16:47

It does seem very individual with some people not feeling ready and needing to grieve but others, although still grieving, wanting to be pregnant again. I've had 4 miscarriages and always wanted to get pregnant again as soon as possible so tried straight away but the last time was our last attempt (I do have 3 children) and it was the worst because I knew that that was it . Trying to get pregnant again almost gave me something to focus on and aim for.

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belgo · 21/03/2008 16:54

nauseous - I miscarried last July. We started trying again immediately and I was devastated when I didn't become pregnant for 5 months. And when I did, I miscarried again. I didn't have time to grieve because I became pregnant again just two weeks later. That was a risk from an emotional point of view - but it seems to have paid off as I am approaching 12 weeks and so far so good.

It's still very early days for you, and your hormones will be all over the place. Give yourself time to think about how you feel.

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expatinscotland · 21/03/2008 17:14

it took me a month before i even wanted sex again.

tried after my period returned about 7 weeks after ERPC and conceived straightaway.

am about 8 weeks on, i think, but be warned, you always worry in subsequent pregnancies.

it sounds awful, but when i go for the scan, i don't want to see the screen at all until i know if the baby's alive or there at all anymore.

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belgo · 21/03/2008 17:19

yes, expat's right, your next pregnancy will be stressful and worrying. I also didn't want to look at the screen when I had a scan at 8 weeks.

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belgo · 21/03/2008 17:19

Is everything alright with you expat?

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expatinscotland · 21/03/2008 17:22

nauseated all day, belgo. and heartburn as well.

also feel quite big in the womb area, like teh womb's getting large.

but won't know anything until scan.

GP wants me to have one because he said even though i had one period after MC, it's possible for the cycles to be erratic for a few months afterwards, so i could be farther along than i think.

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belgo · 21/03/2008 17:26

expat - my womb also feels huge, and my bump is already large, and I'm assuming that's because it didn't completely go back to normal following my miscarriage.

I'm feeling nervous on your behalf for your scan! I really hope all is well.

Nauseous - following my second miscarriage I really thought that I would never become pregnant again, and I thought we should wait. But my feeling changes completely within too weeks. Your hormones will be completely up in the air at this stage.

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3NAB · 21/03/2008 17:32

Sorry for your loss

I had a m/c 3+ years ago and had one period before trying striaght away. He is now almost 3.

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expatinscotland · 21/03/2008 17:49

i'm hoping that's the case, belgo! it would have been at least 7 weeks post ERPC, however, because we didn't have sex without protection till February.

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RipMacWinkle · 25/03/2008 10:41

Thanks for asking this Nauseous. I wondered this too.

I had an early mc a week and a half ago and am not sure how I feel about trying again. I think DH would definitely like to as soon as possible but I'm more hesitant. I suppose I'm sad that if/when we get pg again, I'm going to be expecting the worst from the start instead of that initial excitement.

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summermummy · 25/03/2008 20:37

Hi - I had an mmc and erpc nearly 4 weeks ago and found once my hormones settled down and 2 and a half weeks I fell back into ttc mode much more easily than I thought. Infact am quite enjoying the fact that I have no idea what my cycle is so the boredom of the 2 week wait hasn't kicked in yet. I think I'm also bouyed up a bit by the fact that you're supposed to be more fertile for a couple of months and don't want to miss the opportunity, might feel differently if it takes a while again. Its early days for you though (nauseous and RMW) and everyone's different so hopefully you'll recognise when you're ready. Good luck.

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Nina2 · 26/03/2008 19:57

Sorry to hear about the m/c. I also had a mmc in Jan (discovered at the 12 week scan) and my first period since has just finished. I know what you mean, I sort of feel like trying again but not sure if I'd handle it all going wrong again, as I've had an ectopic, a 'disappearing' twin, a mmc and I'll be jobless later in the year. I also have a gorgeous ds .

I'm afraid only you will know when but I'm afraid that any next pregnancy whenever it happens will be scary. Good luck and hope that you feel better soon.

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