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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

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When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Conception

I WANT A BABY!

28 replies

MammyShirl · 14/09/2004 12:16

I cant stop thinking about having another baby. I have a beautiful dd 17mths and she is the hardest and most wonderful thing (sorry could not think of another word)I have ever experienced. I have really enjoyed being a mammy. I have had days wher I have moaned saying how hard my life is but thats normal. Most of the time I love every second.

Problem is we are not financially secure, but saying that we never have been and we had dd1 with no problems.
Also my sister is getting married next August, I am the hen night organiser and bridesmaid. She asked me to not be pregnant on the day.
My partner said he wants us three to spend more time together first.

I just cant beleive how time flies and keep thinking I dont want to waste time.

Everytime my period comes I feel sad.

I know I'm being selfish as its more for me. I just have this immense need. Seriously I think all day about it.

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katzguk · 14/09/2004 12:22

i'm in a similar boat, i would love another baby, but life's just not right at the moment. My MIL died three weeks ago, my jobs contract only has 15 months left on it and i have to go to the states in Dec (am never flying pregnant again - whole other story). but deep down another baby is all i crave at the moment.

NomDePlume · 14/09/2004 12:29

MammyShirl, it is incredibly hard to keep a lid on feelings like yours, the urge/need is so strong. I'm not sure that I have any real advice for this situation, but I do think it was pretty selfish of your sister to ask you not to be pregnant on the day !

MammyShirl · 14/09/2004 12:34

hello
its not just me then. i was reading book last night called Making Babies by Anne Enright... it made me think

"Ther is a lull, a sort of hopelessness that comes over a women before they just have children, or iso it was for with me. I did not know here it came from. Perhaps, ot came from my body, perhaps it came from my life but i had a feeling that what i was doingwas no good, or that i was not good at it. i ahev seen otehr women sink suddenly like this, they lose confidence, they dither, and then, shortly afterwards, they have chidren"...

After reading this I thought "oh my god, is this me?" I am trying to start my own business at the moment, so I can work a couple of days from home and bring in some needed cash - maybe I feel I cant do it, I'm also a bit bored, I enjoy my dd so much and put so much of my time into her that I know i am good at that! I am a great mammy and I dont think I have ever been this good at anything... yes i make mistakes and i moan now and then but overall this is the one thing inmy life that I have succeeded in and most importantly enjoyed. So maybe I am trying to just do what I know i can succeed in - making little people. But I know its a whole new ball game with two!

I guess maybe I dont beleive in myself enought to start up this business... I dont know maybe I think too much.

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MammyShirl · 14/09/2004 12:37

nomdeplume - sorry forgot to say my sister said it in jest. she is lovely really. if i did happen to fall pregant she would not really mind. i know it would just be easier if i wasnt or did not have a new born baby on the day iykwim

main problems are money and partner not in agreement about it.

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MammyShirl · 14/09/2004 12:56

katzguk - you around?

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runtus · 14/09/2004 13:43

Mammyshirl, have you explained to your dp how strongly you feel? Fair enough if you have but I quite often expect my dh to 'know' what I really want and to act accordingly, then I get upset when he doesn't.......

On the new business side of things, it does sound as if you are having doubts. This doesn't mean you can't do it though, quite often it is the things we want most in the world that we are most scared of doing. If you didn't want it, you wouldn't be so worried about failing would you?

NomDePlume · 14/09/2004 13:49

Fir enough re your sister MammyShirl, I got the wrong end of the stick

Titania · 14/09/2004 16:22

me too...... and ive already got 3!

maybe if you explain to dp he might come round....maybe he just doesnt realise how badly you want another one?

MammyShirl · 15/09/2004 23:24

Just got back from meal with friends and one of them announced they were 13 weeks pregnant - im really happy for her and sooooooooooooo envious!!!

My dh said he is getting worried about me and that these feelings im getting are becoming abnormal. i cant hide how i feel and i know what i want

I WANT A B.A.B.Y!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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emmatmg · 16/09/2004 07:15

Mammyshirl, you sound EXACTLY like I did 1yr and 9 month ago.

I was absolutley DESPARATE for another baby (No. 3 for us) and it was all I could think about. I had to physically stop myself talking about it(often failing) to friends as they were bored stiff hearing about it. Dh was pretty bored too, after 15 months of trying to change his mind as he didn't want anymore.

The only way I can explain it was that I was incomplete, 2 just wasn't enough, it had to be 3.

DS3 will be 1 next week and for me the feeling didn't go away until I had him.

Sorry, I'm not sure if thats good or bad news for you but I just want you to know that I know how you feel.

emmatmg · 16/09/2004 07:18

PS. you certainly not abnormal either. I would cry with envy at newly PG woman and it got so bad that I couldn't even look at the maternity clothes in cataloguea and had to avoid the whole section otherwise I'd cry.

As I said I was DESPARATE!

golds · 16/09/2004 07:35

Your partner has said that he wants the 3 of you to spend more time together first, how about another 9 months. Your dd will be about 2yr 2 mth before the 2nd arrives - nice age gap. I have 2yr 4mth between mine and its so nice when they play together

runtus · 16/09/2004 08:32

I've just re-read this thread and realised that maybe your dh has a point in wanting to spend quality time with you and your dd beofre thinking about having another one just yet? He hasn't said no to having another baby in the future but he just isn't ready yet.

I know this is hardly usual mn's advice but maybe you should see what he is saying as a good thing? Fair enough you want another baby now (that isn't abnormal) but it can't exactly be a bad thing that your Dh just wants to let your dd grow up a bit first and for you to get on a more even footing financially. Men don't have the same hormones we do, so he is not going to necessarily understand the 'need' you have, no matter how many times you tell him about it.

Hardly what you want to hear I know but it might actually be for the best to wait a year or so. At least then you know the babay will be 100% wanted by both of you and you will be more secure in the rest of your lives......

Tessiebear · 16/09/2004 09:38

Think Runtus has got a point - your DH (like mine when DS was that age) can probably see life getting back to normal, more sleep, less early mornings etc etc - i bet if you give him a year he will start to see how your DD would benefit from a sibling ( we have a three yr age gap - mainly because i could not have contemplated doing it any sooner - and my DS's are still really close) It was actually my DH who suggested we try for another one!

EvanMom · 16/09/2004 20:40

I sometime wonder if I'm a bit odd. I had ds1 and as soon as I had him thought "... I want to start that all again..." Dh suggested we leave it for 6 months! I fell pg again with ds2 when ds1 was 7 months old. I felt broody as soon as I'd had ds2. Tell me? Is it hormonal? Why do I always yearn for another baby? I have found ds1/ds2 hard work (15 months between) but I love the chaos of it all. We have decided to start trying for #3 soon and I can't wait. ds2 has just turned 1. Will I ever stop wanting another baby?

Socci · 18/09/2004 18:45

Message withdrawn

MammyShirl · 19/09/2004 12:52

hello Socci

I am 26. I had originally planned to have my first child when I was around 28! My dd was def a very big surprise but I am glad now she cam when she did. I found out I was pregnant when I was 23 and gave birth aged 24.

I have talked this over with my "mum" friends and we have decided thats its best if I wait until next year then we will all try

I have decided for financial and security reasons. I dont want to bring my baby into this world not being able to give her what i gave dd1 if i can help it!!! Fingers crossed I can wait!

Also I have got my new business that I am in the process of starting up so being pregnant would have slowed it down.

.... but i still would like a baby now... oh!

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katzguk · 19/09/2004 13:10

sorry just notice your are you still here!
aorund now still wanna chat?

MammyShirl · 19/09/2004 13:14

hi

im here and still wanting... hee hee

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katzguk · 19/09/2004 13:19

i have good days and bad days!!

still would like another baby though

MammyShirl · 19/09/2004 13:28

Do you think the reason we want another baby is because babies make us happy? By the way sorry to her your MIL passed away - death hurts so much. Will your work contract be renewed, do you want it to be?

My life is happy but like everyone else I have good days and bad. We are struggling money wise, trying to start up a business and my 19 year old brother is a junkie, we have found out for the third time now that he has gone back on it after we all helped him through the last cold turkeys and gave love and support. Two weeks ago he looked in my eyes and swore on everything, he has become the best liar - its scary. this time im angry, i have not called to offer my support.... oh its a long and boring story - junkies waste everyones time. i hope this time he will realise how much hurt he has caused and see he has people that love him...

like i said, babies bring smiles and make you happy and maybe i want one to wipe over all this mess.

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MammyShirl · 19/09/2004 13:30

better go and wash before she wakes... lazy today.

ill check later.

take care

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MammyShirl · 20/09/2004 11:27

finished period last week but for the last couple of days my nipples have started to tingle like then did with the "let down reflex", i also felt a few tiggly feelings in my tummy - digestion?

have i finally gone mad?

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katzguk · 20/09/2004 11:30

hmmmmm

bit like me then i have only ever had indegestion/heart burn when pregnant had it for three days now!!

MammyShirl · 20/09/2004 11:41

what? are you pregnant?

i forgot i had real bad heart burn on saturday night, i had to get the gaviscom out.

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