Coping with TTC and friends falling pregnant. Help!

[KarlaD]

Hi
Advice and support needed. I'm new to this but here goes.

I have been TTC for the last 8 months after getting married in November but to no avail. A close friend who I see both at work and outside of work has announced she is pregnant.

Whilst I'm happy for her I still can't help feeling jealous and wondering why it's not me. I ended up breaking down in a fit of tears on her the other day as all I will get now is 'when is it your turn?'

Anybody else been in this situation and any suggestions how I can deal with this? Can't just ignore her so that's not an option! X

[smogsville]

I think you should be really honest. In a similar position to you in terms of timeframe, TTC #2. When a (close) friend announced a pregnancy recently I was genuinely thrilled for her. I was also furious that it hasn't happened for us yet!

I'm sure your friend will understand that emotions are mixed for you. Jealousy is perfectly natural.

In the meantime, maybe have a think about seeing your GP? You can always tell them you've been trying for a year... Likelihood is nothing's wrong, but it might set your mind at rest and help make your friend's pregnancy easier to deal with.

Good luck, this TTC business can be a bit of a pig.

[Sarahg1]

Yep this is totally normal, I think most people on these boards has felt the same at some point whether through struggling to conceive, or because OHs have made us wait to even start trying.

I was desperate to start trying, my then boyf said we hadn't been together long enough (just over a year) and within a few days announced his sister got preg after knowing someone for two weeks. I nearly choked myself crying and refused to see the baby that was born in Feb. However, in a bizarre change of circmstance we got engaged a few weeks later, we're now married and trying ourselves but it's just not happening for us so instead of being resentful at not startin TTC I'm now resentful he made me wait so long and now nearly 6 months later we've had no joy.

I don't really have any advice on how to deal with it I'm afraid but I agree with smog that if it's someone you are close to then honesty might be the best answer and she will understand I'm sure. You never know, she may have struggled to conceive too.

There are some books that people have recommended to help your mindset, including fertile thinking. I've downloaded but not read it yet - it's supposed to help with the psychological side of things too.

I have my fingers crossed for us all to get BFPs really soon xxx