Hi Tulip. X post. Welcome and I am very sorry to hear about A. I don't know about you, but I find it so hard to understand how one day everything can be fine and the next your baby has died, I still can't really get my head around it. Also, I felt physically very well, it doesn't seem right, surely if something was so wrong my baby died then I should feel awful too? It just doesn't make sense. I hope your consultant appointment goes well, I totally understand the nerves. I hope your OH can go with you too? I found it helpful to have a list of questions I wanted to ask (they didn't know the answers to all of them) as I find I often get bamboozled by doctors.
I don't know if this is your sort of thing, but my cycles were a bit wonky for a while after labour (still v regular, but ovulating at the "wrong" time), and I found that acupuncture really helped. Not sure if it was the acupuncture, or just the passing of time, but it was also quite relaxing and my acupuncturist let me cry on her too, so it was like a mini therapy session. If you are worried about the time it might take to conceive again maybe acupuncture would be worth a go? Mine is registered with the BAC and specialises in fertility/women's issues. But also, if you ready the last thread you will see that Owl took a while to conceive her daughter, but not so long for her rainbow.
It must be so hard having so many people you are close to being pg, well done for coping so well to start with. Is A's due date coming up, or have you made it through that milestone already?