I'm soooo broody to TTC#3 and DH is currently weighing it all up so we can come to a decision. Our children would be 12 and 9, am I completely mental to even be contemplating this?!
What is like having a big age gap? Any possible issues?
Thanks x
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12 year age gap - bad idea?
19 replies
Tranquilitybaby · 03/02/2013 23:08
OP posts:
AwimbaweAwimbawe ·
03/02/2013 23:16
There is 21 years between me and my brother & we get on great , no jealousy etc & no arguing over toys so its worked
well for us 
We are very close & him been born didn't change my relationship with my parents
TheDetective ·
03/02/2013 23:56
Another with a large age gap. DS1 is about to turn 11, and DS2 is 10 weeks.
It's fab. Truly fabulous. If I had my time again, I'd of had the following age gaps: 3 years between first 2, and then an 8-9 year gap and have another 2 with 3 years between. 
I'm going to have a third, with a 3.5 year age gap, all being well.
But there has been no negatives as far as I can see from having a big age gap. I'm still sad I didn't give DS1 a sibling sooner. But no problems with the actual gap.
He's fantastic, despite saying he didn't want to do nappies, he has been pestering to do them! The only thing I don't let him do is feed the baby, as he is a bit windy at times, and can vomit feeds, so don't want DS to have that responsibility. But he's a brilliant helper, dressing his brother, carry and fetching. He had a bath with the baby this weekend! He even warms feeds up for me. I miss him when he's at school. Sometimes I think he is a better help than DP.
I say go for it! The way I see it is, I'd rather regret something I'd done, than regret not doing it at all.
deleted203 ·
04/02/2013 00:09
From my own experience teenage boys are absolutely fabulous with toddlers, if that's any help . They find it very easy to bring themselves down to the level of a 3 yo and will happily play with them!
Darksideofthe80s ·
05/02/2013 17:35
Dd1 20 this week, Dd2 just 3, ttc #3 age gap has never been an issue
metimeatlast ·
05/02/2013 20:27
DS1 was just 13 when DD2 was born, i allowed him to take 2 days off school so that he and my mum could be with me through labour, he stayed the whole time and only left the room when asked to upon midwife suggestion for procedures and when it came time to push, I had a very quiet labour, nothing gory with extreme screaming luckily 
He was extremely proud and felt a great bond with his new sis from the word go, he is very patient with her and is a treasure to be around. now she is 3.4 and can clearly speak, he does often say things id rather she not say! not swearing, just teen slang that doesnt sound nice from a 3yo. the thing that seems the funniest is the "hat switching" in the voices between talking to a teen and talking to a toddler otherwise if you get the two mixed up, then they both seem to look at me as if im daft .
id say go for it, without a doubt.
Im not sure if you have got boys or girls or 1 of each, but i know that when i did have DD2 although i cried cos i was told she was a girl not a boy at 20 wk scan i have always been grateful that i had one of each, so that it didnt seem to DS that he was losing my attention to another boy, wanting His things etc,etc. As cos she had pink and him blue, the "competition" didnt seem to be there IYSWIM?
best of luck with your dessision
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