Just Shagging - JSers roll up for fred 12

(1000 Posts)
Kittenkatzen Thu 01-Nov-12 14:03:15

Oh, the other fred filled up all of a sudden! Oh well here's a new one....(horse feel free to replace if you want to be fred starter, just didn't want everyone in limbo!)

Fred rules;

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share wine and brew with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.
Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.
Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).
Viroid = This is you, dear poster. The reason for this is a closely guarded secret, known only to....er....well, nobody as far as we can tell!
POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit).
Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.
Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

The link to Part 11 is [[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1553148-Just-Shagging-The-lazy-TTCers-heaven-this-is-Shaggers-Corner-Part-11 here]

The link to the latest grads thread is here

Happy shagging shaggers grin

frogchops Tue 27-Nov-12 20:24:45

Haha. We will totally get done by trading standards. Yes we are trading... Trading stories, craziness and bodily fluids things we wouldn't share with people in every day life!!
Have just returned from fat club. 2.5 pound weight loss means I've just scoffed a cheese roll a packet of wotsits and am about to eat my peanut butter Kitkat. (Shit, if I get upduffed I better be able to still eat those!!!)
Anyway, am just popping to read bears link....

MrsBri Tue 27-Nov-12 20:24:48

Certainly NO shagging for me! :-)

AndieMatrix Tue 27-Nov-12 20:37:07

Frog The no nuts thing only really applies if you or DP have eczema, asthma or, obviously, an allergy. I ate nuts, my DCs are fine. smile And well done on the loss.

I had started charting but I'm lazy AND forgetful so back to JSing with intent and keeping an eye on pant snot....which today is copious so when DP sent me a dirty text from the lounge while I was in the bath I was very pleased. grin

frogchops Tue 27-Nov-12 20:50:12

Ooh mr matrix is donning his shag cape!
The whole text thing is something my oh and I have never done. Maybe it's time, lol.
Will try ov sticking tomorrow, altho pant snot signs suggest its a no go yet. DP won't know what's hit him when it is!
Am reading tht thread bear, and laughing my head off!

Preposteroushypothesis Tue 27-Nov-12 21:16:40

Hi everyone, i have been lurking for a while but am having my coil removed on Thursday and so just about to start some serious shagging. Thought it was time to officially join you lovely ladies! I have a DD who will be 2 next week but she was errrr somewhat serendipitous so this is our first experience of ttc, not sure what to expect but I think that JSing will definitely be our ethos!

Name: Preposteroushypothesis
Age: 27
Location: London
Any DC: DD 2yo
TTC: first month

zen1980 Tue 27-Nov-12 21:44:57

Hi all - just wondered if i could join too have been lurking and wondering whether to dip toe but my dh made me feel a bit more happy today, as he told someone outside our family that we are officially TTC. We have a dc of nearly 3 so now is defo the right time. Haven't been using anything for about 3 months but this is first proper month with ov strips- terrible i know! but anyway am due ertd this sat an am already crampy. So wont hold breath, oh well onwards an upwards!

Hooya Tue 27-Nov-12 22:53:33

Ah no time to catch up but just to say welcome to zen and preposterous <waves> happy shagging!

Fingers still xed for GBT / Horse

Sorry for the bfns sad but onwards and shagwards!

AndieMatrix Tue 27-Nov-12 23:43:39

Welcome preposterous (I may shorten this further as I am lazy£ and zen join the insanity.

Frog DP is permanently in his shag cape. His text read "do you want my cock?" So classy. I recommend something a little less blunt if you start the naughty texts with mr Frog.lol

MiL has just text me "So, are you pregnant yet? Big man says you are" by Big man she means her psychic friend's spirit guide (who grassed me up as TTC at a reading in Sept) he must have spiritually seen sperm meeting egg during my bathtime shag.lol

Kittenkatzen Wed 28-Nov-12 07:34:48

Welcome prep and zen smile

Arf at "do you want my cock?" andie! And they say romance is dead!

Think I'd be a bit creeped out if my MIL told me her spirit guide was watching us TTC I have to say..... confusedgrin

frogchops Wed 28-Nov-12 08:02:39

Lol@ that text. I think my DP would be fine with that bluntness.... As when I said that mr frog was well up for it the other night in his cape, he also said (as I was almost asleep :-/) ' bloody hell, just have a go with my cock'
So yes, the romance isn't dead. I'm considering buying him another cape, just for when this ones in the wash!

frogchops Wed 28-Nov-12 08:04:26

Btw andie, did you reply 'yes please' ?

MrsBri Wed 28-Nov-12 08:17:51

Men and cocks...my DH will ask if I want a good cocking! :-) Such romantic gestures!

Rockchick1984 Wed 28-Nov-12 09:30:07

Lol at good cocking - makes me think of the character in Stella who's swearword of choice was cocking!!! DH asks me "how sleepy are you?" which is hardly romantic hmm

Gary keeping everything crossed for a sticky pregnancy for you. How r u feeling today? If you wanted to be a Keith next time you could be KeithDuffysEyebrows smile

AndieMatrix Wed 28-Nov-12 09:59:47

Kitten Yeah, it was a bit creepy thinking she text me that and only an hour before we were DTD. hmm

Frog Of course wink

MrsBri Good cocking!! Too funny.

What romantics we have eh?

My DH came out with a classic the other day. Something along the lines of: waves I've got to go back to work in ten minutes so you can't have any cock, but I can give you a quick tongue job if you want blush

frogchops Wed 28-Nov-12 11:29:49

Well that's gona get you no where waves!!
I'm thinking of banning any activity that doesn't involve cock. I would say tmi but I know you'll all cope!!

In other news, I'm currently sitting in an infant waiting room at the hospital (for work) and am surrounded by tiiiiny babies. Sigh.

Preposteroushypothesis Wed 28-Nov-12 18:13:01

No worries on the name shortening, I would do the same!

It sounds as if your DPs/DHs are just as romantic as mine, one of his favourite lines is 'would you like a protein injection?' this usually follows me complaining that I am tired or have a headache etc as he claims it is a 'cure for anything' hmm (warning: first ever emoticon use)

Preposteroushypothesis Wed 28-Nov-12 18:15:21

That's crap for you on the baby waiting room frog, I am a childminder so am frequently in this position so I know how you feel. I suspect it will be much harder now that we are actually trying ourselves!

MrsBri Wed 28-Nov-12 18:47:54

Ooh, Prep...all lines my DH will use!

And when I now say I'm craving salty snacks, he offers me the chance to give a blow job. Huzzah!! :-)

How are you feeling today, Gary? Fx it's a sticky one.

AndieMatrix Wed 28-Nov-12 18:55:04

Haha Prep when I'm ill DP offers me a dose of "Dr Matrix's Miracle Cock Oil" apparently that cures all ills.
Frog That's pants about the infant filled waiting room. I was at the women's hospital two weeks ago watching all the new dads arrive with the car seats. Broody alarm.

frogchops Wed 28-Nov-12 19:22:08

Ooooh no. I will let no salty potion anywhere near my mouth. DP knows this too, so he lets me know when to ..... Well, stop. Lol.
Plus, wrong hole ladies. There will be no upduffing with these frivolities!

Preposteroushypothesis Wed 28-Nov-12 19:25:25

Haha well aren't we lucky to have such generous men who are always thinking of our health?! Would love to see DPs face if I offered him the alternate 'miracle cure' if he had a bad dose of man flu!

frogchops Wed 28-Nov-12 19:36:52

Bleeugh. Anyway. Need tips on staying awake for a bit of the above tonight! DP goes to football any minute. Doesn't return until 10pm and then will 100% want to watch the football he's recording. Soooo, that's at least 11:30 and I'm knackered!!

DingDongBelle Wed 28-Nov-12 19:44:11

Frog: did you dtd yesterday? If you did, have a night off and get some sleep! Eod is best anyway so they say smile

DingDongBelle Wed 28-Nov-12 19:45:04

Ps. Am officially late. The witch due today and no sign...

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