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Childbirth

Poll-Your Mum at the birth?

275 replies

IndecisivePramBuyer81 · 24/06/2013 16:28

For those with DH's - did you have/would you have your Mum at the birth of your first child?

OP posts:
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cupcake78 · 24/06/2013 16:37

No didn't need to. But if dh wasn't going to be there she would be next on my list.

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TwentyTinyToes · 24/06/2013 16:38

Nope, just had DP, i am close to my mum but in all honesty i think she would get on my nerves. Although we used hypnobirthing so we are quite clear on what we want/need.

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Twinklestarstwinklestars · 24/06/2013 16:39

No but I don't speak to my mum, if dh has to be with the other 2 dc this time I'll just stay on my own until he gets there.

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MustafaCake · 24/06/2013 16:42

No way.

It was mine and DP's child, it was our special time together.

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BabyStone · 24/06/2013 16:42

Nope, wouldn't have wanted her there even if she lived near by and for some strange reason DP couldn't/didn't want to be there. Was going to have him and my DNan but ended up having DP and MIL

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runningonwillpower · 24/06/2013 16:42

As well as husband? No.
In preference to husband? No.
In preference to random stranger? No.

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rundontwalk · 24/06/2013 16:43

No. I'm extremely close to my mum but it was (with the benefit of hindsight too) a time for just DH & I. She would have been my second choice though! Although with dc2 I did most of it at home & she dropped us to hosp (dc arrived 30mins later). I found her a bit panicky so prob best she wasn't there the whole time!

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memphis83 · 24/06/2013 16:43

I did, dp is known to faint in scary situations and the sight of blood so he asked if my mum could be there just in case he fainted, he didn't he was an amazing support. It all got a bit scary at the end and lots of people were in the room, he was able to look after the baby while my mum stayed with me.

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Ragwort · 24/06/2013 16:43

No. She lived 300 miles away for a start Grin.

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absentmindeddooooodles · 24/06/2013 16:43

Both. My do was in the hospital with me from 7 am. Then right at the end 7pm, my mum joined us just in time to see ds born. Was a great balance for us. My do and I talked it through, swell as with my DM and agreed that this was the way that would work best for us. Was lovely

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MirandaWest · 24/06/2013 16:46

No I didn't and wouldn't have done. Would probably have preferred to be on my own if DH hadn't been there.

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mommabee · 24/06/2013 16:47

I had both went in at 6am with DH Then Mum came about 12 DH went home and came back about an hour later and both stayed until ds was born then mum went and left me & DH with our new baby Grin was brilliant and had both again the second time too!

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puds11isNAUGHTYnotNAICE · 24/06/2013 16:48

Hell no!

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MikeLitoris · 24/06/2013 16:49

I was quite young when I had my first dc and my mum just assumed she would be there. I didn't feel like I could argue.

With dc3 she again assumed and I wouldn't take no for an answer.

MIL was also making noises about coming to the hospital to wait.

I went in about 10.30pm and phoned my mum to tell her mil had been drinking so couldn't babysit.

Managed to sneak out of the house (mil next door neighbour) without being seen.

Finally got to have a baby in peace!

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Elquota · 24/06/2013 16:50

No way!

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MrsDmitriTippensKrushnic · 24/06/2013 16:52

Yes, I had DH and my Mum at the birth of all 3 of my DC. I needed DH there for emotional support (and he wanted to be there) but he's not the most assertive chap - Mum's a lot more practical and having her there made me feel safe. I knew she'd back me up if I needed it, or chivvy me along when I flagged. It worked for us but I don't expect it'll work for everyone. Smile

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ARightOldPickle · 24/06/2013 16:52

I was the mum at the birth Smile
Very surprised to be asked (and in my day you were on your own, not even DH was allowed in) but it was one of the most amazing, emotional experiences of my life!
On the way home afterwards I thanked son in law for inviting me to be part of it but he just said it was what DD1 had wanted and that was the most important thing for him ...aww! They are having another next month but I'm on call for babysitting duties this time.

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SirChenjin · 24/06/2013 16:52

No way - can't imagine DH wanting his MIL there (I certainly wouldn't have wanted my MIL), it was our special time together, we were adults in our thirties so really didn't need or want another adult there, and my DM lived 120 miles away. Oh dear god no!!

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beckie90 · 24/06/2013 16:54

I had dp and mum with me both times, I'm a big mummys girl lol and after my first birth when I was 18 I ended up in intensive care I was so glad my mum was there, so as I'd a big chance of same happening the second time round when I was 20 I wanted her there again, she can calm me down more then dp can. I have 6+5 weeks left with ds3 now and I've said I want them both there again, but it might just end up been dp. Although my mum stays at the top end and does not wonder down to look, I made that one clear lol.

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madamginger · 24/06/2013 16:54

I did, dc1 I had my mum dp and mil (plus 2 midwives, student MW, paediatrics Dr, scbu nurse and obstetrician)
Dc2 mum and dp
Dc3 just dp mum was looking after the other 2 dc

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rosiedays · 24/06/2013 16:55

Oh had a full on fall out with my mother over this.) she is so put out that i don't want her there when I'm in labour she has booked a cruise for the whole month I'm due.
Haven't had her at the birth of my others.
My dd wants me to be with her when she has her 1st in October. She says I'm the only one who will keep her calm and not let her get away with being a drama queen. ( she was a drama student)

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Ginderella · 24/06/2013 16:56

Gawd no! She would make the process all about her! DM did attend the birth of my younger DS baby. After DN was born, the HCP came into the ward with tea and toast for my DS, my DM thought it was for her and was quite put out when the nurse told her there was a cafe downstairs if she wanted a cuppa!!

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ksrwr · 24/06/2013 16:56

hell no!

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Mindyourownbusiness · 24/06/2013 16:57

No way. Would find it squirmingly embarrassing tbh. As l would if my DD asked me to be at my DGCs birth, which l am sure she wouldn't. We are quite a reserved family and not very tactile etc. so no, just no !

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pardonmytits · 24/06/2013 16:57

It wasn't planned at all, but I ended up with both DH and my mum. Went into labour at 36+2, had planned a home birth with DH and a doula but had to go to hospital instead. It ended up being the best thing that could have happened (mum being there that is) as we had quite a traumatic birth and she was there to support both DH and I, and our new little mister of course :)

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