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Bullying

Bullying within a close

3 replies

closecall · 16/06/2014 23:15

My DS is being bullied within our close. There is a majority of girls who play out, mostly aged about 3 years older than DS. Then there is DS and a 5 year old boy, who has been adopted as mascot to the group. They come banging on our door to get DS out there and then isolate or victimise him.

He is normally a very sociable 9 year old and it is horrible to see this happening.

I feel I need to confront them but how do I do it without making it worse for him? The fact that it is a close makes it all very claustrophibic.

OP posts:
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andsmile · 17/06/2014 00:23

Oh tough one - could you approach neighbours, a one who you are friendly with?

Or maybe go out there, make an excuse, and say oh what are you playing, doing? and smile Or you are all getting along there arent you AND give them the look. The look that says you know, you ave their number.

Talk to your DS about how to rebuff or remove himself form these situations - I have to counsel DS about this type of thing (8)

I would consider if DS is upset, get his friends round to yours, let him experience some postive friendship/play before building him up to going back out there.

Find other stuff to do? does he have to play out there?

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BrianTheMole · 17/06/2014 00:28

Does he have to play out there? It doesn't sound like he's got much in common with them. I'd invite his school friends over instead and do other stuff.

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DeWee · 17/06/2014 10:04

I would say avoid him playing out, have him having his friends over (and no they can't go out and play with the girls) Whenever they call, he can be busy.

Are they deliberately doing it, though, or is it just that he is 9yo boy and they are 12yo girls? So they want to do different things.

I'm asking this from a personal point. Because as an adult my dm mentioned that she hated my friends calling for me because she thought they did it deliberately to upset me. Because she wouldn't let me just wander round the village the way they did, so when they moved on, she wouldn't let me go, so I got upset.
Actually, it was more that she didn't understand is that that was how they worked, they went from house to house, spent a little time in each and moved on, if you wanted to go (or were allowed) with them you went, if you didn't they moved on. Dm thought they should have just stayed and played if she didn't let me go, which I don't think is being fair on them.

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