Have to speak to the teachers, what do I say to get a result?

(5 Posts)
EmilyAda Mon 11-Mar-13 09:11:16

Well done you for keeping on at the school
I have recently made a prat of myself over what I thought was
bullying - thanks to all who made me realise - make sure you take any
back up with you have school meetings partner/friend/granny etc make notes
& dates of events
It does sound to me like this other child is in need of some support himself if
he doesnt know how to play etc hows the home situation for them
could be he is frustrated over things he has no control over & this is his way
of coping which is not fair on your child i know
have they got a buddy scheme at school where older children come and show younger how to play?
good luck

PrincessLayer Thu 07-Mar-13 19:57:10

DS tries to keep away, but they are in the same class. Trouble is this boy whispers things, or says it out of earshot of others. They are supposed to stay in separate sections of the play area, but obviously have to pass through one to get to the other.

Met with head, and two teachers today, and quite frankly felt bamboozled, and outnumbered. DS was in tears and I felt like crying myself by the end of it.
DS is now sat in a corner away from this boy, who seemingly will have free reign of the class, but DS has to stay seated. Unless a teacher/TA hears the things this boy actually says, then it's our word against his, so they really can't do anything.

This boy is always in trouble for fighting and arguing with other boys, and I can't understand why he's being believed and my DS isn't. It wouldn't be the first time he's said cruel and distressing things about someones family. Hopefully they will take more notice of DS when he reports things now though.

I was wondering if there was more too it, and if DS hadn't told me everything, but he had.

Anyway...ofsted were in today and I've taken great delight in filling out my online form.

JuliaScurr Thu 07-Mar-13 19:23:23

The school should have a clear and effective policy on what he shoould do if the bullying starts. What is the school doing to stop the bully and protec your dc? Ask for specifics - named teacher/playground supervisor and exact details of proposed action, then check with dc that it happens and if it works
good luck

MrsMushroom Thu 07-Mar-13 19:15:23

I think having read your other thread, that you need to go in to see the HT and make noises about the Governers. I would be very unhappy that this bully is not being sorted out...if he has emotional problems then it is the school's job to see that he gets help.

He needs it by the sound of it!

However...what I would also want to know is why your DS is not moving away from this boy and instantly putting himself either with other kids or a teacher or playground assistant when this bully approaches him?

he must be listening to quite a bit of abuse to get wound up enough to hit the lad.

Does DS tell you why he's not moving away?

PrincessLayer Thu 07-Mar-13 12:00:34

I posted this thread a few weeks ago:
http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/education/1682048-Advice-needed-on-classroom-arguments

So, school have rung. It's happened again. DS hit the boy yesterday (I knew, he told me when he got home from school). I know he shouldn't of hit him, but I honestly don't blame him.

The last thing I say every morning is "Stay away from...." And he tries, but the kid's not stupid, and makes sure anything he says or does to DS is out of the view of teachers, so even when my DS tells the teacher that something has happened, they only say "well as I didn't see the incident..." and nothing gets done.

My DS is a lovely kind boy who takes things to heart, and bottles up his anger until it blows. Hardly surprising when some kid is saying "hope your baby sister dies, she's deformed" etc. He's never had any trouble with any other kids, only this one.

I tried the serious verbal abuse track last time, but the teachers glossed over it.

I really need to know what to say. There's usually 3 of them and only 1 of me, and I feel a bit overwhelmed by them. I'm not the best speaker.

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