Fufulina - yes I think he would happily go most of the day with out missing me too much, he eats like a horse and drinks water well. In the daytime I generally feed him about 1030am before his morning sleep, and 3/4ish before his pm sleep, then its bedtime feeds, latenight feed, in the night and early morning.

But if he's really tired he will go down for his nap without milk no probs. I suppose I have just not tried to reduce any feeds, at all. And maybe I could <lightbulb moment>

Am confident he will manage fine on less, he got weighed this week and has done great.

We had lots of wakings last night with only a good sleep between 3 and 6am but I think he was thirsty really as he stole some of DDs sausages at teatime.

Hi MoaningMinnie - just to say that my DD is nearly 11 months old and I find that if I'm not with her - she doesn't miss boob (normally she feeds 4 times a day, and we dropped the last night feed about 2 months ago). It seems that she's fine without it during the day. She's also BLW and she just tends to tuck into her food with a bit more gusto.

In fact - it was at 7 months old that I realised she didn't need so much in the day when I went away for a day to visit a friend with a new baby and left DH with tons of expressed milk and she refused the bottles totally (she'd been taking them fine on the odd occasion before then). And she was so fine, we dropped from 7 feeds in 24 hours to 5 the next day. And then she dropped another about a month later (the night feed).

I dropped the night feeds gradually - when I decided to do it she was down to two. And I dropped the 4am (ish) one first by going down from two to one boob only at the feed and then shushed. And then did the same for the last one. But it was only because I felt really confident that she didn't need the milk - and was getting lots of food down her neck in the day.

Sorry for rambling but basically - if you want a day without DCS, am sure your DS would be fine (just feed first thing and then when they get in?), and the night-weaning I found much easier than I thought it would be. For the last feed it was literally two nights - first night 2 hour wake up and we were with her the whole time and then she slept till six and then the second night, she was awake for an hour at 1 - just grumbling really. And then the third night she slept through 6-6. I was gobsmacked. And she's done at least 11 hours a night since then (although the early mornings are a killer!). And I thought DH settling her would help - it didn't. I ended up shushing her - but I thought I'd rather she had what she's used to (me) without boob than something completely unfamilisr - IYSWIM.

Am I remotely on topic??? Anyway - hope some of this helps in some way.

lol, i am also very guilty on that score myself.

<faints> My first ever unmumsnetty hugs

Time is zooming by at a horrifying rate, can't believe DD is coming up for 3 I do know DH is sometimes a bit envious of how much time I spend with the DCs compared to him, I think I'm just ready to go back to work soon, will be in the new year. Bit of cabin fever, unrelieved by trips to playgroup and supermarket.

Best get off to bed, tiredness obviously completely unrelated to late night mumsnetting

DD2 feeds 3-6 times a night, at almost 14m old, btw, so i understand re the night feeding - it sucks, literally.

I only have two - one will be 6y next month, the other is almost 14m old, but the freedom I have compared to DH stuck behind a desk all day, is quite liberating. I think he is jealous of ME!

I can go to the gym, take DD2 to the creche while DD1 is in school and get some exercise and much needed me-time, i can go shopping, i can visit friends or whatever, etc, while he has to do 9-5.

Okay, he gets away from the kids, so their annoyances dont annoy him so much and he can come home with a fresh perspective and a fresh temper to boot, so when he gets home, usually i do something away from the kids, like laundry or have a bath or summat alone, so i can get some fresh perspective again before bedtime...

It will turn the other way, i think. And to be honest, though i complain (vociferously some days...), i wouldnt have it any other way. Every day we do is a day we cannot repeat - that mantra kept me going through the early shit days after DD2 was born, all dark and wintry and depressing, now, it gives me a point of view with respect to how fleeting their childhoods really are. DD1 is going to be 6 ffs. Next July i will have been married for a decade. The time has flown and all i did was blink once or twice and foom, it was gone.

Anyway, sorry to ramble. Unmumsnetlike **hugs** to you.

some lovely kind words from you all

leonie- am glad to say he has no teeth yet, but I'm sure it won't be long!

Have no help except for DH wrt childcare, he does the sunday dad type thing, takes DD out for fun stuff but does nowt else really - as I said, a lot of it is a DH issue really.

But DD will be starting mornings at nursery after xmas and DH will have to pull his weight a bit more when I go back to work <crossing fingers>

It is a bit claustrophobic at times, I have v little autonomy at the moment I feel, I get up when the DCs make me, feed them/wash them/etc etc ad infinitum and the only time I get to myself is in the evenings after they have settled and between feeds and chores...and I'm v jealous of DHs freedom at the minute

Am having an extra tired day though today so it all feels worse <shrugs>

I finally admitted to myself to being annoyed with BF when DD2 bit me so hard there were 8 tooth imprints for over 2 hours in my nipple... the more i shouted/cried/screamed, the more she laughed and clamped harder...

I was as close to quitting as i have ever been.

I too feel claustrophobic sometimes. You've done a good, good job getting this far.

First of all, well done on BFing for 11mths - as other posters have said, that's pretty good going by anyone's standards.

I can understand your feeling tired and sometimes claustrophobic from BFing so long - coupled with the desire to continue feeding your baby (for various reasons).

I know what it's like feeding an older baby and toddler, and how hard it can be to get them to "go through" when they are quite dependent on a feed or at least a quick latch to settle themselves. Like you, my DP was unable to help at night very often, and if I went in to settle the waking baby, inevitably I'd end up doing a feed as I was shattered and it seemed like the quickest way to get him to go back down.

FWIW, I tried on and off to wean him off at night, offering water for the first waking (around midnight), which encouraged him to just wake later (around 4-5am), at which time I offered a feed. At the time, this seemed like an improvement!

Sounds like you could do with some help from friends or family to help you get a bit of a rest; you might feel happier about the BFing then. Around 11mths I wouldn't feel too bad about offering a little cow's milk now and then, if only to get him used to the taste and temperature. Also, offer plenty of water and make up any deficiency in calcium by using cow's milk and other diary products in your solids.

Hope you have a few good days and nights, then you'll probably feel more on top of it all.

I'm in a similar position - ds is 13 mths and I'm starting to feel it is time to give up or at least cut down bf. I have managed to reduce it to two feeds - morning and bedtime. When he wakes during the night I can normally settle without feeding as long as I get to him before he has woken up too much.

I dropped the day time feeds very gradually (one per fortnight) and make sure there is always a cup of water around - I have tried cows milk in a cup but he just plays with it and sprays it around the room - he has a varied diet and plenty of yoghurt so I hope he is getting enough dairy...