How can you tell when they've had enough?

(18 Posts)
qumquat Thu 27-Feb-14 18:19:26

Dd never seems satisfied after a feed. I never know whether to just keep on feeding her or This afternoon she's been feeding now for three hours, had 4 boobs plus 60 ml of formula. I've winded her throughout but she's still crying inconsolably. Normally I'd continue feeding till she drops (generally constant boob till a surrender 150 ml bottle feed at 11). I'd resigned myself to this as epic cluster feeding, but the midwife today said there was no way she could be hungry for all that, but she didn't answer my question as to how I should know when to stop. She does have poor latch so maybe she's not getting much at the boob? (Have worked on this endlessly , only solution currently to work on my pain threshold). She's clearly exhausted but seems too hungry to sleep ?Sometimes I try to stop and walk her in the sling which sometimes works to get her to sleep, other times it's just a waste of an hour and back to the boob. Is there anything I'm missing in terms of hunger/tired/windsigns?

ForgettableTampon Thu 27-Feb-14 18:21:18

How old is baby?

Poor latch can be a sign of a TT.

qumquat Thu 27-Feb-14 18:22:44

She's 7 weeks and had tt clipped last week. No improvement so far I keep working on it. Do you think the bad latch is the reason she feeds for so long?

ForgettableTampon Thu 27-Feb-14 18:27:31

Yes I do. A TT (you prob know this) can mean the baby has to work superhard and takes longer to get a feed in. Nb No professional role here just a mum.

Do you think the TT has reattached?

Have you seen a specialist/LC had a full feed observed

ps sniff your baby's head for me please xxxx

qumquat Thu 27-Feb-14 18:35:54

Ah , thank you for your ps. I'm so destroyed I forget to appreciate her!!!

ForgettableTampon Thu 27-Feb-14 18:39:54

Oh love (hug)

it won't always feel so grim and wretched and grind-y (I might be projecting a tad here!)

qumquat Thu 27-Feb-14 18:42:42

To answer your question, I've seen various people from volunteers to midwives to lactation consultants at breast feeding cafés. Lots of very helpful people but dd and I seem to flummox them. Often they think we have a good latch then see my nipple and realise it's not. A private lc id spent a fortune on even said to me "well, it might be her palate in which case it will never improve" before presenting me with bill,..... Which is why I've been working on acceptance, involving pain killers and the Mad Men box set, which is fine for me but I don't want to be making her suffer.

ForgettableTampon Thu 27-Feb-14 18:51:12

Oh grrrrr

I am a bit stumped tbh.

let me have a think

ForgettableTampon Thu 27-Feb-14 18:52:55

Oooh ooh

rugby hold instead of trad cradle hold?

That worked for me.

Baby on pillows front to back of couch then underarm to boob.

MightBeMad Thu 27-Feb-14 18:55:12

Where in uk are you op? Maybe we can suggest someone more helpful!

drwitch Thu 27-Feb-14 19:02:40

Many babies feed more or less continuously at this age. Is she happy when feeding? Is she putting on weight? Does she do lots of wees and poos. If so the easiest thing would be to let her feed all the time, much much easier than walking her around for ages in a sling. It will get better when they start being more interested in other things
BUT if it hurts you then you need to see someone to sort out her latch

qumquat Thu 27-Feb-14 19:55:46

I have been letting her feed most of the time, but the midwife and lactation person saw today seemed so appalled I'm doubting myself. I also worried about her sleep, she only sleeps around 8 hours out of 24, which seems way too little. Everyone else's babies I know seen to feed for nice half hour stretches, which makes me worry there's something wrong.

froubylou Thu 27-Feb-14 20:37:19

Qumqat my little boy is 11 weeks old tomorrow so all still fresh in my mind. Am certainly not an expert but weeks 6/7/8 were tough. Cluster feeding constantly all day as well as evenings. What helped me was telling myself I would get to when he had his first inoculations so I could comfort him afterwards.

He was almost 9 weeks by the time he had it and by this time it had got better. I had cooked a couple of evening meals. Had some baths in peace. Been mum to dd after school.

It does get better.

With regards to your tt I have no experience of one. But when I had painful nipples I found biological nursing I think its called helped. I can't get on with the rugby hold despite having huge norks. But lying down is helpful too.

qumquat Fri 28-Feb-14 05:03:58

Thanks. I just get so frustrated with differing advice. All the info says to offer the second breast, then it assumed that will be it- never mentions the third fourth fifth sixth breasts!!!

Had a particularly painful feed just now, gave in after 2 hours and gave formula, but she's still hungry so will have to carry on. Just want baby to be happy and well nourished and I can't so it! (Sorry, tired and emotional at 5am!)

Ericadm Fri 28-Feb-14 05:44:05

Can you tell if he is actually eating all the time? I have the same problem. My baby is 5 weeks and is at the breast all the time. I have been weighting him before and after feeding just to have an idea if he is eating or not (we had difficult start as he would not latch for the first two weeks and now using breast shields, he is low weight and janduiced). I worked out he takes most of the volume in the first half an hour (15 minutes each boob), then he just like to keep sucking a bit, sleep 5 minutes, then sucking again but he is not actually taking very much. So I am stopping after an hour now and trying and distract him for a bit so he can have a break and re-build an appetite.

FairyTrain Fri 28-Feb-14 13:35:35

BF counsellor suggested cross cradle position, being really particular about getting latch correct and breast compressions to me, working to a certain degree so worth a try....?

MissRatty Fri 28-Feb-14 20:51:59

The poor latch sounds like the issue. We had this and went to a bf cafe where we got help and things have much improved. The lactation consultant likened it to drinking through a pinched straw...they just get small amounts which takes the edge off hunger but doesn't satisfy them fully and they quickly scream for more. Also make sure you wind well.

I've heard that nipple shields can help latch, but for a long term solution I would definitely try to get some support. They could also check for a tongue tie. Nipple shields may assist in the short term until you get the assistance, but my LO freaked at them at first!

You will need lots of patience as this is a time for cluster feeding and growth spurts, but things will improve if you get some help.

Best of luck x

whereisshe Fri 28-Feb-14 21:23:09

She may be looking for comfort rather than food - there is a development leap at around 6-8 weeks that makes them very fussy and very very clingy. Have you tried putting her in a sling so she feels safe and close to you without having to feed?

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