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8 Months Pregnant & feeling lonely..

5 replies

Kimmy87 · 13/08/2014 14:05

hi all..
im 8 months pregnant and ive noticed the friends I thought were loyal & for keeps have not had the slightest interest in me lately..
I know life is busy I completely understand that, but ive been poorly in this pregnancy with OC, SPD, High Blood Pressure the list goes on and my friends cant even find the time to text me or ring just to see how I am.
Even with the powers of Facebook nowadays theres no excuse not to keep in contact especially as I see them keeping in contact and making plans with each other.
one friend even messaged me the other day after a visit to hospital for suspected early labour and told me she thought I wasn't bothering with her and basically I needed to sort myself out.
im feeling really down in the dumps about all of this and Im really not sure on how things will plan out.
am I wrong to feel like this? is it my hormones? am I overreacting? I really cant tell.. please Help!!!

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TwoDarlingsxx · 13/08/2014 14:26

Is this your first child?

From my own personal experiences when you have a baby and your friends don't have kids they soon drop you and trust me when I say you definetly do find out who your real friends are!

When your baby arrives you will not care less about them because your baby will be all that matters. It can definetly be lonely especially because you are so close to giving birth sometimes you could just do with a girly chat.

I know it takes two to make a friendship but if your friends can't even make the effort to see how you are considering your pregnant then they are not worth the worry or stress :)

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Kimmy87 · 13/08/2014 14:51

This Is my second child and all my friends are Mums too which makes it even harder.
I often think why was I good enough before this pregnancy but im not now.
Being a mum is one of the most important things to me.. it will always be My Children first..
I guess people just drift apart.. its just a shame it had to be when I needed them all the most Sad

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TwoDarlingsxx · 15/08/2014 20:37

Oh I see, seems abit strange then because they have children themselves so they should be able to relate to you being pregnant ect

Sounds like to me that they are not actually 'friends'. I also have two children and my friends never bothered with me with either pregnancies but they soon come to me when they need something!

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zanuda · 03/09/2014 10:38

You might be, as you suspect, having hormonal jumps or overreacting. On the other hands make sure you're not getting depression, also it's called something like postnatal, it might hit you now.

One other thing to do, try to go to all those classes for pregnant, not for info, you probably already have that, but just to get out of your state of mind, you'll see new people some of them might be in the same spot.

Another thing, those symptoms kind of close to those of Seasonal affected Disorder. Try to be outside something like ~2h at the daylight time and see if you get any changes. If you do, then you might got SAD developed...

And anyway talk to GP, they might have some more suggestions.

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Coletterbox · 04/09/2014 11:42

Poor you! I remember well how hard it is to be heavily pregnant, suffering with various extra symptoms (I had SPD and gestational diabetes in my recent pregnancy) AND choc full of hormones that make you question EVERY feeling you have!
Without knowing them or you, it's hard to say whether your friends are being rubbish or whether you're being hormonal ;0) Have you said any of what you put in your post to them directly? Is it possible that they just don't realise how you're feeling and would be mortified if they did? I think the most important part of friendship is two way conversation - if you're feeling rubbish then let them know (it doesn't need to be in an accusing 'why are you leaving me out' sort of way because that doesn't tend to be all that productive) but maybe just contact them and say you're feeling a bit down in the dumps at the mo because of your pregnancy and do they fancy a coffee or even a catch up over the phone? NO PREGNANCY TALK ALLOWED! ;0) Just have a gossip, chat about your fave TV shows or your other kids or whatever it is you chatted about pre-pregnancy...

Hope that helps and just in case, I'm sending you big hugs too xxxx

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