So glad I found this part of the forum. I find it hard to talk to anyone, so iv bottled alot up for the past year.
Last year I lost my dad, who has his own battles and I hadn't seen him since a teen. The day before he passed, he begged a nurse to find me, not knowing what to do she trowled social media with no luck as I'm not on much. As a teen I felt like he didn't put me first, he had his own difficulties and the last time I saw him I. Told him I didn't want to see him again, being that stroppy, hormonal adolescent. Looking back I understand his reasons, and realise he really did try his Damn hardest for me. And I live with the guilt of being that horrible teenager, he spoke about my alot though apparently with pride.
7 days after loosing him, my best friend died. It was hard, she had been in hospital a while and I badly needed her when I lost my father.
I saw two bodies of two people I love in the space of two weeks. I attended two funerals in a month. I didn't talk to alot of people and I remember uncontrollably crying, alot. My other half took time off work to help with our little one, I couldn't get myself back together.
Its only a matter of days till the first anniversary and I can't stop thinking about either. And it feels like I just want to cry my heart out, yet I feel silly telling the other half I'm crying over that again, I used to cry in the middle of the night and wake him, I used to feel so silly but he was always supportive of me.
Sorry for rambling, I just wanted to get my feelings out there, its been a while since iv spilled them to anyone.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.
Bereavement
almost a year.
1 reply
DragonFlyx · 11/07/2014 15:23
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.