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Bereavement

Finding this so hard

5 replies

JackieOHH · 24/06/2014 18:31

Hi, I'm new to this group, but really want to be able to say how I feel without judgement.
My dad died on the 15th June from cancer.
His funeral is tomorrow....how do I get thru it?
He'd not been ill long, and his decline was swift and cruel. It robbed him of everything. I'm utterly devastated.
I'm trying to support mum, ( I'm an only one), but I miss him so much already.
I'm angry he's been taken. My immediate concern though is tomorrow.
Sad

OP posts:
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hoedown · 24/06/2014 18:40

I'm so sorry for your loss Thanks

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Ohheavens · 24/06/2014 22:14

So sorry for your loss.
What a shock for you.
Do you have any one you can talk to, perhaps a cousin or other close relative.?
Wishing you and your mum strength tomorrow xxx

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Safeinourbubble · 24/06/2014 22:34

Grief is one of the most all consuming emotions I have ever felt. I think a sudden death like your Dad's makes it even harder. My condolences.

You get through tomorrow because there is no choice. I have been to "good" funerals and I have been to one, which has left its scars. Hopefully, the support of others will ease the day. People come because they want you to know they loved your Dad and that they are there, although they cannot take away your pain.

I would recommend counselling - it does help and you are going to need support, too. Having someone who is not emotionally involved to listen was a godsend.

Take care. I hope you get some sleep.

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mummmypirate · 24/06/2014 22:34

I'm so sorry you're going through this. We lost my dad almost 1 year ago to cancer. Just over 2 weeks from diagnosis to death. In fact we only found out where it had come from - his lung - post mortem. In those last few days we just knew it was in his brain and had spread from somewhere else. It was horrendous. All I can say 11 months on is that you will find a way through these bleak, desperate early days and months. Somehow it becomes less raw and more bearable. The grief is a terrible black hole that you keep falling into at the beginning but slowly learn to tip toe around as time goes on. Take care of yourself.

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Gintonica · 25/06/2014 10:50

Jackie - on a practical level, consider going to see your doctor and she/he will give you something to help you get through tomorrow. That's how I managed.

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